My husband will be leaving on saturday for australia and will be away for a month. please i need some advice about how to manage the kids more effectively and what can i do in the evening just not fair being all alone for so long with no support i am going to go crazy

Amina - posted on 03/25/2009 ( 9 moms have responded )

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The kids are 5 and 4 and they will be on school holiday plus easter coming up i just dont feel like celebrating with hubby being away

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Rachele - posted on 03/25/2009

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Don't forget about yourself if possible have the kids go for play dates at their friends at the same time and do something for you, even if its going home and doing your favorite hobby, or just relaxing

Viquen - posted on 03/25/2009

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The month will fly by faster than you think.  As a retired military spouse whose husband is working abroad with 4 kids here at home (he's been gone 8 months now)...trust me.  The first couple of days will be the most difficult, but you'll get by.  Do you have family nearby?  Ask them to give you a hand.  Don't go changing routines if you can help it.  Consistency is important, especially at bedtime.  Join a museum as suggested.  Make sure to make yourself some "me" time.  Even if it means trading some babysitting or asking your family.  I promise...the month will be over before you know it.  A month is nothing!!!

Leanne - posted on 03/25/2009

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hi there my sis in law has the same prob well they live in OZ and her husband has had to fly to brum and they have not long moved out there.

But my advice to you would be even tho its hard enjoy your time alone with your kids,try to wear them out in the day with walks to a local park or a kick around in the back garden or if the weather no good then little activerties in the house like making cards for day daddy cuming home or making cakes with them, i no my lil girl likes that.

The more you do with them in the day they will sleep better at nite then when they are slleping have "you" time, go read that book or watch thah dvd u have been trying to watch...or just get the girls round for a good chat i do and it helps to talk to people and if you have family round get them to help/involed.



Also surprise your hubby with a scrap book.....take some pics of you and the kids wen your out and about or even making cakes and let the kids help glu the pics in and write lil notes under them then give it him when he gets back. You then have the joy of looking back and saying "yes it was hard but i had fun with my kids " and maybe your feel happier in your self.

Keep in touch xxx Leanne nd her lil girl Neve xxxxx

Jennifer - posted on 03/25/2009

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last spring when my husband was away i found that the best thing to keep my kids' mind off daddy being gone, tire them out, and spend quality time with them without breaking the bank was to get a children's museum membership. they loved it, it wasn't too expensive and we still go whenever we can (usually once a week)

Vanessa - posted on 03/25/2009

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I'm not sure exactly what you mean by how can you manage them more effectively. My only advice is to come up with ground rules (or use the ones you and your hubby already have) and be consistent. Don't give in on some days because you don't feel like dealing with the children getting upset or mad at you... just stick to your original plans and be consistent.



As far as at night... if you are talking about what you can do with your kids I would say establish a bedtime routine and stick to it. Whether its bathtime, story time, hugs and kisses, and lights out... or whatever you want to do. Again, it's all about being consistent.



 



If you are talking about what can you do for yourself... do something that is just for you (the woman, not the mommy or the wife). For example, go to the library and check out some books to read. You could also start a hobby like scrapbooking, knitting, painting, writing, etc. If you find something you enjoy doing it will make the evenings seem less lonely.



 



Finally, do you have a webcam? Will your husband have access to a computer while he is in Australia. You guys can get webcams and use Skype (download it at www.skype.com). It is a program where you can call each other and see each other while talking. This way your kids can talk to their dad and you and your husband can see each other. The calls are free as long as you do them from one computer to another.

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Kelly - posted on 03/28/2009

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You might find it to be easier than you think! I know I find that on evenings when my husband is working away from home, I get things done faster and can have kids in bed, kitchen cleaned up, and me relaxing in a bubble bath with a good book! For us, it has to do with the fact that I pretty much never turn the tv on, but if he's home, it is on, even if no one is really watching it. To me, that just causes delays and extra chaos. I have had friends make similar comments. Its not that we don't love our hubbies, but when we just do everything our way it runs smoother LOL. I bet you will really enjoy the extra involvement you will have in the kids' routine. As so many have said, just be consistent, and you'll have this down in no time. Just think how great it will be when he comes home and you can celebrate!!

Amina - posted on 03/25/2009

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and oh yes the one thing i will enjoy is not making dinner every nite also a good time to loose that extra kilo's

Amina - posted on 03/25/2009

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thanks so much for the advice .... kids are in a very good routine the only thing is that is normally dads thing but i will really spend more time with the kids and bathing them and reading stories will just be much more special. got some books from the library but will keep u girls up to date with how it is going....

Jennifer - posted on 03/25/2009

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last spring when my husband was away i found that the best thing to keep my kids' mind off daddy being gone, tire them out, and spend quality time with them without breaking the bank was to get a children's museum membership. they loved it, it wasn't too expensive and we still go whenever we can (usually once a week)

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