my son gets very jealous of my other children..how do i deal with this without pushing him away???

Tanya - posted on 01/25/2010 ( 3 moms have responded )

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my 4yr old son hates it when i have any physical contact with my other 2 older children, im finding it very difficult because obviously my others want kisses and cuddles too, but my 4yr old makes this very difficult for them!!!

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Kate - posted on 01/25/2010

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o, or maybe u could try distracting him while ur playing with them,maybe dad could hav some one on one time like reading a book or playijng a game in his room while u focuson another child for a bit?

Kate - posted on 01/25/2010

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perhaps u could try talking to him about this and explaining that your just having a little time with (so and so) if possible, but ino explaining isnt easy with all children. depending on how old your other two are? if one is a baby, try not to respond emeadietly, as if u r dropping things u r doing with ur 4 yr old to get baby this can cause jelousy. you could say things like " hey i think i heasr bub crying.. do you? will you come and help me get her from her bed?" and get him involved, at 4 they love doing things like getting nappies at change time. try as hard as u can not to physically or emotionally push him away as this will only create more anxiety when spending time with the other children andmake him more clingy. tell him often "did i tell you how much i love u today?" so he isnt searching for that confirmation wen he see's u with the other children.... and if possible try as hard as u can to embrace him wen he comes to jion in wen ur spending time with the others... let him blow rasberries on the babies bellly and give him a tickle and cuddle too, chances r if u openly involve him in it, he will not try so hard to be involved and these periods where he wants to join in will get shprter and shorter... dont no if any of this helps but i think imbracing it now will help in the long run, and the more he is pushed away, the more intense he will become in getting your attention. good luck it must be difficult

Jenny - posted on 01/25/2010

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get them to play together in activities what they will both enjoy and make your older son realise that your other children need attetion as well as him and show him that they can play together

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