My son won't stop biting! smh..i need help

Ashley - posted on 05/05/2012 ( 14 moms have responded )

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Idk what to do. My son will be 17months in a week 1/2. Telling him biting is not okay,or trying to put him in time out doesn't work and of course im not going to hit him, so i need help. At first i thought he only did it when he was upset,like when someone took a toy from him, but now im noticing hes doing it throughout the day. I also dont think its teething,because most of his teeth are in. Any suggestions?

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Cheryl - posted on 05/05/2012

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I have been a daycare provider for over 20 years and have had my share of biters. What I find is biters do it because they get a big reaction. Sometimes it is teething but more often than not it is the reaction. What I do when one of my dc children is going through a biting stage after trying timeouts and saying firmly "No biting!" is they have to become my best friend. What that means is, they have to be right by my side and if they can't be, they are in a play yard. Well being by my side is rather boring (I let them have toys but they have to play right beside me). his gets old very fast and pretty soon they realize they would rather not bite and play with their siblings or friends rather that sit right with me. It has worked every time though it is a bit tough on me (or the parent) because you have to be vigilant. It usually only takes a day or two to work for the most part.

Janice - posted on 05/08/2012

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I worked in daycare for 6 years and have my BS in early childhood ed and this is how I would handle it.

I do not advise biting back. An older child can learn from that sometimes but a baby doesn't typically understand - this is what it feels like when you do this to me. Instead they just think it is a game.

Anyways, I think you should stick close to your son in order to figure out why he is biting. Is he just biting you or other children? If its other children give them the most attention and care for their "wound" and ignore him and just say "Biting hurts. You may not bite." Does he think biting is playful? I know in my family we often pretend to "eat" each other. This became an issue with our daughter because she couldn't "pretend bite and was really biting instead. We had to stop that game for a while. I know you don't think he is teething but having something he can bite may help. Have a toy/ teether and every time he bite tell him we dont bite mommy or friends (or whoever) then give him the toy and tell him he bite this.

Karen - posted on 05/08/2012

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This might sound cooky, but I sing the "don't bite your friends" song. I can tell my daughter something until I am blue in the face (shes 2) but as soon as I start to sing it, shes like "OH OK!"

I don't know why singing works so well for us, but it stopped her biting. I haven't been bitten in months and months now. I also learned that I can sing the don't bite song, but change the words and it still works.

"Don't, don't don't bite the ipad!"
"Don't, don't, don't bite the remote!"

This is the song!

Amanda - posted on 05/07/2012

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My son was a biter! But I also noticed that he bit more when he was excited. I cried when he bit me like full out cry. This came after time outs and the yelling. The first time I cried he started to cry he didn't get it at first. When he did it the second time and I cried fake tears and all. He the wheels turned. He did it one more time and I cried then bit him. He got the point. I didn't bit hard just enough that he felt it. Once he felt it he never did it again. I would rather bite him then let another kid do that wont control how hard they bite down. Some kids don't understand why it hurts until they feel it. I am not a bad mom trust me, but my mom did it with me she bit me twice and I never did it again either.

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Jessica - posted on 12/15/2012

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Tap his lips (not hitting) and tell him "No bitting!" or "Dont Bite or else!" the or else makes them scared for what will come if they bite. If he still bites after this take him to a dollar tree and let him pick out a dog toy tell him if wants to bite something bite that.

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well my son is 11 months old now and is doing this biting thing too. i believe it's because of teething. Your son might not have his molars in yet. that might be why he is doing it. i tell my son "no". i will sometimes bite him back. but lightly of course. maybe you should try a cool rag on his face when he bites (if he's biting for the heck of it). it might stun him to stop. if not try biting him back without hurting him. he might see that he don't like it and will stop. good luck

Janice - posted on 05/08/2012

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Biting back is only acceptable with your own child and so is completely useless if dealing with any other child. I don't think the parents of a child in Ashley's care would be happy if she bit their child because they were biting.
Also while it can work, it more often does not work. My hubby bit my daughter during a biting phase and it just made it worse. She thought it was funny even though she pulled her arm away quickly as if it did hurt and then smiling tried to bite her dad again. She thought it was a game.

Amy - posted on 05/08/2012

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bite him back not hard! it worked with my son and to all who thinks that's bad i didn't hurt him just gave him a little nip and he never did it again!

Karen - posted on 05/08/2012

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I swear Yo Gabba Gabba has a song for every situation. At dinner I am like "But Lily, green beans want to go to the party..."

Just 2 nights ago, she said "yuck!" to this tuna pasta I made. I started singing the "try it! you'll like it!" song. She ate a piece and said "mmm i yike it" bahahaha!

I don't know what I would do without Gabba.

Ashley - posted on 05/08/2012

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LOL! i play that song for my son all the time. i love yo gabba gabba. I have recently been noticing that he does it when someone has a toy he wants or he feels someone isnt being nice to him. I run a daycare out of my home so its an everyday thing. But, Its mainly when he is excited though.

Charity - posted on 05/08/2012

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I agree with Amanda. I bit my now 8 year old daughter twice and that put a stop to it. My now 3 year old son, I only had to bite him once. They don't understand that it hurts. Most children bite for attention. They really are not trying to hurt anyone, just trying to get attention they feel they are not getting. With both I didn't bite hard, didn't even leave a mark, but I bit hard enough for them to feel it then got on their level & asked them if they liked being bit? They obviously said they didn't like it; so I explained that biting hurts and if they don't want someone to bite them then they shouldn't bite. I also told them if they wanted my attention there were better ways to get it, say Mommy, take my hand, etc. With me being the one doing the biting with my children I was able to control how hard, and explain afterwards why we don't bite.

Sal - posted on 05/05/2012

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my little one was a horror for biting and in the end i tried the no response at all approach as i worked out she was doing it for attention alone, i told ,i told my son to not say a word not look at her next time just wait for her to stop (luckily it was my much older son who i could explain my actions to) but didn't he and i didn't acknowleged her at all, just acted as though she wasn;t holding one to his arm with her teeth, this was the last time she ever bit anyone and she actually said..."mummy i biting and biting but niky won't talk to me" she never did it again, it took one time.....
he was willing to try anything at this point so went with my crazy plan.....
my old playgroup had the policy that the child who was bitten got kisses and hugs all the attention and the biter was just not acknowleged at all, it seemed to work and we never had a big issue...up to 20 preschooler and younger and very few bites....

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