Need some help

Cassiej19 - posted on 08/31/2017 ( 2 moms have responded )

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Hello everybody, me and my husband only have two kids my husband works and I stay home our oldest child is in high school in our youngest is Elementary, our oldest one is 15 and a half and the youngest is 11 and a half. I made some new school rules for the two kids, because I got so tired of everything going on around here okay like for example last year my oldest child was in 9th grade he never does this before until then, he does not do his homework and lie about it or if he does do homework he won't turn it in in in school he'll do his school work but don't turn it in or sometimes he just don't do the school work and lie about it so I told everyone this the new year so I put that on the rules for him to be grounded this year if he does that again for 3 weeks. I made some other rolls if they get a d or F they are grounded as well my youngest fifth grade she just got a D I don't know if I should just ground her for 3 weeks or just let it go. someone told me if you make Rules you have to stick with them that's the problem lot of times I make the rules and then later on change them and I don't stick with it. I don't have any friends so I can't talk to anyone about anything and my mom just don't understand. Can't talk to my husband because he works 8 hours and he comes home and he's tired so he don't want to hear Too Much. The other one that was on the rules if they leave their room a mess or bed messy before leaving the school they'll be grounded for a day. My oldest child room is a mess and I wasn't sure if I should say anything a lot of times I just let it go and just watch TV. My children don't do very much chores I just do it myself because my oldest one tells me no I don't think so I don't know how to take that in should I say something or just don't worry about it and just go watch TV like I normally do. I think I need some advice from other mothers how to deal with a 15 years old boy and a 11 years old girl. Thank you

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Michelle - posted on 08/31/2017

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So you have said that you don't follow through with consequences, of course they won't do what you ask, you have shown them that they won't get punished.
I don't think grounding should be your only consequence though. Taking away privileges like technology and TV can be a lot more effective, especially for the older one.
Sorry but your husband doesn't work that many hours (not like a 12 hour day or shift work) so he can actually help out. I was working full time and still disciplining my children so working 8 hours a day is nothing.
You need to have rules and consequences and follow through.

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