need some help, and suggestions PLEASE!!! :)

Sara - posted on 02/21/2010 ( 15 moms have responded )

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My son will turn 3 in May. I have tried to potty train him when he was 15 months, 18 months, and 2. he was never interested in trying, so i gave up. i just had a baby in january, and i got tired of changing 2 kiddos diapers! so i decided to just put him in underwear, and figured he would get it. we are on day 4 and he has had many accidents on the floor. but he has also made it to the bathroom too. most of the time he pees a little in his underwear, and the rest of the way in the toilet. i am afraid to go anywhere, cause i refuse to put him in pullups again, for fear he will give up going in the potty!! a friend told me to make a chart and put stickers on when he goes and take off stickers when he has an accident...so i am going to do that. but does anyone have any advise they could give me, or a similar story to share so i don't feel like i am the only one who has a kiddo that just won't get it!! lol

thanks so much!! :)

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I agree with the others: do not take off stickers once you have rewarded them! I might also come up with a reward when he gets a sticker 3 days in a row. As he progresses, give him the reward after 5 days, then 7 days. Once he is able to go through a whole week with little or no accidents, you could take a special trip to Mc Donald's or to the store for a special toy...maybe he can help you make cookies? Incentive is very effective!

Jenny - posted on 02/21/2010

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I used parts of the one-day method and it worked great for my kids. The parts I used:
1. We picked out special snacks and water bottles. This makes sure that they will need to go a lot.
2. We used a peeing baby doll. My kids LOVED being the one in charge of potty-training the baby.
3. We did "dry-pants checks". (Very often!) They simply feel their underwear and tell you if it's dry. If it is, they get a snack or a sticker. If not, just let them know they need to go in the potty. They put on dry underwear and "practice" going potty so they'll be ready when they really need to go.
4. They helped their baby do dry-pants checks and practice going to the potty. Of course sometimes the baby had a "bottle" so they could teach her what to do when she needed to pee.

I'm not really the type to do things by a certain age, so I just started when I felt my kids were ready. For my oldest son, it was age 3. My second oldest son (1 year younger than my first) watched his big brother and mastered it at age 2. My daughter was 3 going on 4. And I have a 2-year-old little boy who hasn't started yet.

These are just some highlights. There's a book that teaches this method, which I got from my mom, who used this method for me. :) Hope this helps.

Medic - posted on 02/21/2010

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My son started in pull ups at 18 months then right before he was two we just took away the pullups and gave him a potty watch we got at the store....it goes off every 30, 45, 60 or 90 min depending on how you set it and it plays the potty song reminding them to go potty. He spent a few days at 30 min then he moved it up every few days and he was totally trained by 2. I really believe if it had not been for that watch he would have never been potty trained.

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Christy - posted on 02/24/2010

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I used the sticker chart thing with my daughter and it worked GREAT!!!!( I did mine a little different though, I never removed any, if she had a accident, then she just didnt get a sticker,) We started a month before she turned 3 and by the time her birthday rolled around, she was fully potty trained!! Another thing and this is just my opinion...pull ups tend to confuse children, I put them on my little girl in the beginning and things were not going well, but as soon as she got her BIG GIRL PANTIES she was going like a big girl!! Good luck.

[deleted account]

Put a portable potty where he can get to it quickly. I did this with my first 2 kids. I put it in the lounge because that's where they played, so they didn't have to go far when they needed to go and it was readily there for them.

Karen - posted on 02/24/2010

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Hi, I had a similar problem with my daughter, she would just get to involved in whatever she was doing/playing and forget about the potty. When she was almost 3, I just put her in underwear like you with your son and yes we had a few accidents but she also started getting to the toilet on time and was properly potty trained within a week, however I did still put her in pullups whenever we were going out anywhere....just in case. But once she got the idea the pullups always stayed dry.

Susan - posted on 02/23/2010

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Great idea with the stickers but dont take them off when he has an accident just dont put one on and tell him when we make it to the potty next time you will get a sticker.

Keep it very very positive, also write down when he goes to the toilet keeping record of times and if it is only wee or poo too. This way you will be able to see a pattern emerge and be able to almost predict when he needs to go. Also look out for signs wriggling playing with themselves especially after drinking and eating. Good luck

Maura - posted on 02/21/2010

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Please don't take stickers off when he has an accident that would be humiliating and counterproductive. But adding them when he is successful is a great idea. Lots of kids don't train until 3 1/2 4, so you also have to be patient. This is about him and not what you want. Good luck.

Lisa - posted on 02/21/2010

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My oldest son was almost 4 by the time he was FULLY potty trained. We used to throw cheerios in the toilet and made a game out of it that way.. Silly, I know, but it worked :) Some kids just take longer than others, but don't get angry if he keeps having accidents. I know it's hard and very frustrating, but he'll get it...
I also gave all three of my kids treats whenever they DID go potty. Matter of fact, I'm training my 2 year old daughter right now, and she's doing great. She still has a few accidents here and there when she gets really busy, but don't worry... it takes time :)

Melissa - posted on 02/21/2010

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Find a few pair of underpants that has a design on them that he really likes (Ex: Cars, Dinosaurs, etc.) and tell him not to pee on "Lightning"... My niece cryed the first accident she had, because she had an accident on "My little Pony". She hasn't had an accident since.

This might sound strange, but throw some cheerios in the toilet and have him "practice aiming". He will find it to be FUN, and relate the "urge" to "toilet". The hardest part is to get him to the toilet before the accident-- But once you get him there the first time, it is smooth sailing-- Boys are always a little tougher than girls, but he will get it, don't worry to much ;) Good Luck!!!

Sara - posted on 02/21/2010

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thanks everyone!! this helps soooo much!!! my son doesn't like snow or the cold (strange, i know!) and we have tons on the ground. if he isn't trained by spring time, that is how i plan to do it! i really like the potty watch idea! i am trying not to get frustrated in front of my son and i do get really excited when he does go in the potty, we do a little dance! lol thanks so much!! :)

Natalie - posted on 02/21/2010

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Let him go outside!!! Boys tend to think this is awesome!!! My sister potty trained her son at 1 because they were stuck in a snow storm with no diapers and he was so pleased to pee in the snow!!!

[deleted account]

I would definitely not remove stickers from his chart. He earned those and by removing them you are inflicting negativity. Keep positive. Don't get mad if he has an accident, but show him how proud of him you are when he does make it to the bathroom. I tried training my son at about 20 months. He was not fully trained until he was close to 3 and a 1/2. I spent over a year and a half pressuring him to be potty trained. I hated myself for it. I became so frustrated and angry. It wasn't fair to my little boy. Looking back on it now I know that he just wasn't ready. He's 4 and 1/2 now and I hardly remember him not being potty trained. I do remember what I went through though. I read a lot of posts on Circle of Moms and a lot of them are about little boys not potty training. It truly seems that the majority of boys are not training until they are close to 3 and 1/2. I wish you the best of luck. Try not to beat yourself up over it.

Tianti - posted on 02/21/2010

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My son took forever, it seemed too. He finally mastered around 3yrs, 6 mon. I put fruit loops in the toilet and made a game out of him peeing on them. He even had a treat basket if he could hit so many. He also did better sitting down to pee. Standing up confused him, I think. I learned the hard way not to stress because it made him feel bad and caused the process to take longer. We also had a singing toilet, and we made a special trip to Wally world and let him pick out his own toilet/ seat. Good luck, be patient and don't stress. :) Hope this helps.

Sarah - posted on 02/21/2010

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What you may want to do is remind him every now and then when you notice he has not gone for awhile. Sometimes kids get busy playing and forget they have to go until they start. My son was 3 when he potty trained and it took him about 2 wks. to figure out the timing on when to start to head to the bathroom when he felt like he needed to go, so that might be what is going on with your son. If that is the case it may not last very long before he has it figured out.

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