No More Whining!

Venesa - posted on 02/18/2009 ( 3 moms have responded )

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My boy is nearly 5 months old. Recently, he had a pretty bad fall and since then he has regressed a bit and has a really bad startle reflex going on. Worse than he had when he was born! But that's not my issue. Since this incident everyone has been holding him CONSTANTLY. So much so, that no he wants to be held all the time and is always whining. My mom who lives with us runs over to pick him up and I have to yell at her to tell her no.

Does anyone have any tips for me? I really do NOT want to encourage whining as a way of getting what he wants, and at the same time, I don't want him to be miserable either.

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Kate CP - posted on 02/18/2009

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Put a shock collar on your mom and shock her whenever she runs to pick him up.

KIDDING! JUST KIDDING!
Anyway...no you can't really spoil a baby and they are not capable of manipulation. However, your son does need to learn to be independent and self-comforting techniques. Give him lots of tummy time and encourage your mom to play with him on the floor. If he's already on the floor he can't fall. He should be spending most of his waking hours on his tummy anyway.

Kids will react to your reaction. If he bumps his head lightly on the bottom of the table-not enough to hurt him at all-but we immediately jump up and make a big fuss he will respond by making a big fuss, too. One of the first phrases my daughter learned to respond to was "are you okay?" Before she could talk she would either let out a wail and I would comfort her or she would just go back to what she was doing.

Tell Nana to count to three whenever he has a bump. If he starts crying before 3, then he needs to be comforted. If he just keeps going...let him go! He'll be okay. :)

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You could try giving him some playpen time. Just put him in the playpen with a few toys to look at or put in his bouncy seat and something to grab for 10 - 15 minutes a few times a day. Babies are smart and can learn to use their crying to get what they want along with what they need. You could even start with 5 minutes and then work up to more. The playpen time helps them to learn to play on their own and be content.



You are wise to nip this now! He may whine or cry if he's used to being constantly held, but he will learn that the playpen is fun and that mommy always comes back. Just do it gradually and he will get it. One thing to double check with the whining is if he's tired. If he's tired earlier than you're used to, just put him to bed, he may just need to sleep.

Crystal - posted on 02/18/2009

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He is only 5 months old, you cannot spoil a baby.



They are not capable of manipulation, and especially because of the fall he obviously needs more reassurance, and you are the parent and should be giving him the comfort and reassurance he obviously needs.

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