ok i have a 5 yr old son and i cant control his mouth???

Tabitha - posted on 11/03/2009 ( 5 moms have responded )

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ive tryed everything and it worse cuz im home schooling him??help

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Caryn - posted on 11/03/2009

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So Beth..what kind of example is it setting for your child when you say something then turn around and tell your child not to say it. I don't want to step on toes but I personally think as a parent you shouldn't do/say things you don't want your child doing..

Brandi - posted on 11/03/2009

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try not to overreact to his foul mouth. Kids say naughty words because naughty words elicit a strong response in adults. Think about it. . . someone calls someone an Fing B and the recipient of the naughty name gets all angry and goes after the person who called her that. SOOOO if you take away that reaction, he is likely to stop on his own. That does not mean he gets away with the naughty word. My daughter RARELY says a bad word and if she does it was an accident and she didn't know she said it, but if she says a bad word, I tell her "that's a naughty word." and drop it. she is then educated and knows that the word is inappropriate, it doesn't get much of a response, so it isn't that interesting of a word anymore. Also, if you use a lot of vulgar or inappropriate language, you should try to stop. My husband and I don't swear around our kids (occasionally one slips out, but almost never) and we correct other grownups when they swear around our kids. they say a bad word, we say uh uh uh grandma that isn't a nice word. (it's for the kids' benefit and our relatives know that).

Beth - posted on 11/03/2009

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I don't agree with Karen. My husband is a bar tender with a VERY foul mouth (mine's not the most clean either) and my in law's are also foul mouthed. My children don't talk like that. When they hear a word they don't know if it's ok to say, they ask. If it's not ok we tell them that it's a "mommy and daddy word. Good little girls don't talk like that." That's all it takes for us. HOWEVER, I have a neighbor with a 3 yr old son who swears a blue streak! She gives him hotsauce. She shakes the bottle up, wipes a drip onto her finger then wipes her finger across his toung. Yes she gives him a drink to help with the pain. It's working for her.

Caryn - posted on 11/03/2009

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First off, you and your partner need to be able to control YOUR mouths. He is probably hearing you guys say things or watching you do things and a child figures if its ok for mom, then its ok for me. What types of shows/movies are you allowing him to watch, are they age appropriate? Kids tend to pick up a lot of what they do from TV.

I think rewarding good behavior is more effective than punishing bad. Make him a chart, for everyday he doesn't say something inappropriate let him place a sticker on his chart. Have incentives for him to want to get through a week or longer without having a "bad day" For example, if he can make it a week you will take him on a special mommy/son trip to McDonalds, 2weeks you can let him pick out a toy at the dollar store, ect.

For the times he does say things he shouldnt you need to explain to him why the things he's saying is inappropriate. This is why I said you need to watch what your saying, you can't say 'sh!t' then turn around and tell him its wrong to say that, that just confuses him and causes him to not trust you.

Stacey - posted on 11/03/2009

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tape it shut...NO, I am just joking!! I can relate to how frustrated you must be. Public school/home school; the only thing he could be lacking there is socialization with kids his age. Kids pick up bad behavior whether at home or in school. I have a 3 yr old that has picked up bad language from a 4 yr old that I watch. I use the 3 strikes, you are out method. I give a verbal warning with a consequence ex: if you say that word again you will be in time out. (set time equal to age of child) #2 offence put in time out; no talking/playing. time is up I say if you say it again you will not have your favorite toy(choose something that is very dear to him), cartoons, playing outdoors..taken away for the day. follow through if he sais the bad words again, then if strike 3 comes he is done with being able to do anything all day. I think it took a week of very long days for my daughter to realize that i meant business and she now corrects the 4yr old boy whenevr he sais a bad word. Hopefully this will work for you. Consistency and follow through with whatever you tell him will happen is very important for it to work! It works!

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