Overwhelmed but defeated and trapped

Jamese - posted on 05/04/2013 ( 1 mom has responded )

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I'm a stay at home mom of two my daughter is approaching 5yrs, and my son is 2. My husband has a job and have always kept a job but I have a hard time getting work,because I still have to think of my children's care and who would look after them so it's been slow and Im get irritated quick because we also live with my husbands parents (my inlaws) so they drive me crazy with the interference of ME parenting my children, etc. I'm just frustrated because I'm inside most of the day trying to sit and focus on searching for work but then the kids want to go to the park and do things because they are becoming antisy so it distracts me from doing productive things through out the day. So I get pissed off and frustrated and all my husband tells me is "I work all day with assholes I don't want to come home to another one, don't take your frustrations out on me," which really puts me in a corner but endup lashing ALL the way out because I try to hold my composure but its just difficult. He doesn't understand how it is to be a stay at home mom. I know my stuff is long (lol) does any1 else go through this??

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Michelle - posted on 05/04/2013

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I'm sure most SAHM's go through this at some stage. My ex husband used to say the same things. I had 2 boys, 2.5 years apart, as well as working part time and running his business from home. Whenever we had an argument (every night for the last 6 months of our marriage) he would bring up that I ONLY worked 2.5 days a week. I would promptly point out that's what I got paid for. I worked a hell of a lot more unpaid including the running around and invoicing I did for him. It fell of deaf ears and I ended up leaving.

Fast forward 8 years and he finally admitted that I did a heap at home to make his life easy and had diner on the table whenever he decided to come home. It was too little too late as I am happily remarried to a wonderful man. It was my current husband that he said it to and my husband told him that he can regret it forever as far as he's concerned as he now has me and is not letting me go.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that sometimes it's not until they are responsible for the day to day running of the house for a few days to a week then they have no idea what you do. You also need to get out on your own, living with ANY relatives doesn't help when you are trying to bring up your own family. Maybe arrange for him to take some time off work and you go away for a couple of days. Then he may realize what you do every day.

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