Problems with bed time

Diana - posted on 06/22/2010 ( 5 moms have responded )

22

10

0

Alright so my daughter is 17 months old...and is not bed trained...i have no idea how to get her bed trained either....i've tried to do the whole cry it out and she screamed for over an hour...and made herself sick....does any one have any idea how to get her to fall asleep in her bed???

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Renae - posted on 06/24/2010

2,209

23

156

It partly depends how you get her to sleep now and what she is used to, so if you could respond with some more details that will help me to be more accurate.

The most successful no-cry method is gradual withdrawal. There are many different versions of it. Basically, you need to get her lying in her bed and going to sleep while you are there (in bed with her if necessary) and then you gradually remove yourself over about 4 weeks.

For example, at her age, I would put her in bed, sit on her bed with her and read a story, then stay with her and pat her head or something until she is completely asleep and then sneak away. Once she is used to this you move on to the next step. So next you might stop the patting, but just sit with her. Then next you sit next to the bed but not on it. Etc etc. You must take it in small steps and make sure she completely masters each step (at least 3-4 days) before moving on to the next step.

It all depends on what she is currently used to. If say, you are still rocking, then you need to get her used to going to sleep without movement before you can put her in the bed and start the gradual withdrawal.

Hope this helps somewhat and as I said give me a few more details and I can be more specific.

5 Comments

View replies by

Jeanette - posted on 06/24/2010

120

9

17

maybe start with making sure she naps during the day in her bed and then work on bedtime

making sure her room is nice and quiet and darkened even a little if possible to encourage quiet time if not napping

music, story before nap - anything to make it a pleasant experience

Renae - posted on 06/24/2010

2,209

23

156

Hi Diana,

Yes I agree with Jane. Put her in a bed (if not already) and to start just move from the couch to her bed. Then change to lying next to her rather than her on you. So on and so forth.

I know a lot of people will say to get rid of the cup, but personally, I think leave well enough alone, I would let her keep the cup and give it up when she is ready. But of course its entirely up to you. Sleep consultants like them to go to sleep without any props at all. My 15mo has a bottle before bed and he starts to fall asleep on the bottle. I couldn't care less if he is still doing this in 2 years time. If he is still asking for the bottle when he is 21 - then we have a problem! LOL I think people get too hung up on it.

Just remember to take it in very small steps. If you had a sleep consultant come out and draw up a plan for you - the biggest thing they would stress is not to try to skip a step! Many parents think, "she is doing so well I think we can go straight to ...", NO! the baby usually ends up crying and they end up having to go backwards and repeat the last two steps and put themselves a week behind. It can be very tempting to move too fast, especially when baby seems to be doing so well.

The other thing is that it is completely normal to have a few set backs. Babies, especially older babies and toddlers, will have a few really good nights and you will feel like you have made massive progress, then all of a sudden they will start crying and carrying on and you end up in bed with them feeling like you are back to step 1. Dont be disheartened, just let the bad nights slide and get straight back to where you were the next night.

Good luck and you are welcome to contact me if you want to chat further during the process.

Jane - posted on 06/24/2010

274

77

50

Then your next step is to take it to her room. Does she have a "big girl" bed? Or a crib? If it's a regular twin-size, you could lay down with her in the bed till she falls asleep.

Diana - posted on 06/24/2010

22

10

0

we quit rocking months ago..but she falls asleep on me on the couch..with her cup..

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms