Scared for my baby!!

Jane - posted on 04/15/2016 ( 4 moms have responded )

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Hi moms, let me start off by saying I'm a first time mom, and I have a beautiful four month old boy who I just adore. I have struggled with PPD ever since I had him. I'm very bonded to my baby so that's not an issue, but almost every other symptom I have: the sadness, hopelessness, insomnia, you name it. The worst thing for me is how tired I am. I haven't had a good night's sleep since he was born. I'm absolutely, utterly exhausted. I've been trying to get through it on my own, but with the stress I am under in this situation, I have made up my mind that I am going to my OB and getting help. I know that's what everyone will suggest, so just know that I realize I need help, and I am going to get it ASAP. I need to take care of myself so I can better take care of my son. So about my situation. My son got his first cold a couple days ago. Symptoms are sneezing, coughing, trouble eating, (he's hungry but keeps pushing the bottle away and crying; although, he has always been a fussy eater), irritability, weird sleep patterns. Well, Thursday morning (yesterday) at 3 am he started to fuss. As I said, I am exhausted!! He had just been fed about an hour before, so that was frustrating, and on top of that I was half asleep. I'm so ashamed to say this.. But I was rough with him. )': He was swaddled and basically, I picked him up very quickly and kind of.. "plopped" him into my arms? It's hard to describe. ): I did NOT shake him, throw him, hit him or ANYthing violent like that. I don't believe it was a violent action, but rough. It was enough to make him cry for a second, though. ): I immediately was horror stricken that I was mean to my little boy. I cried and cried and cried. Still crying.): I took him to the hospital for his cold yesterday afternoon, and the doctor said he looked great and that it's just a virus and it will go away with time. They did an Xray and everything. But here's what I'm terrified about. I've heard sooo much about Shaken Baby Syndrome these days. As soon as I was rough with him, that's all I can think about!! I googled symptoms for HOURS! Which probably wasn't a good idea. ): This is HORRIBLE timing, because a lot of SBS symptoms are the same as the cold virus symptoms!! I know he's actually sick, but what if he has SBS too and I just can't tell yet?!? Could he have gotten it from me handling him like that?? A lot of people say it's not just shaking! That it could be jerking or bouncing too hard, etc. or tossing in the air, which scares me even more because my boyfriend and I have tossed him in the air (gently)!! ): I'm freaking out. I don't want my sweet baby hurt, or taken away from me!! I can't live without him!! He threw up twice yesterday, small amounts but still. Throwing up isn't a listed cold symptom, but it IS a symptom of SBS. I'm wondering if the Doctor would have noticed if something was wrong? Or maybe it would be too soon to tell? I'm losing it with worry. I literally stayed up all night to keep an eye on him. (I'm visiting my mom right now; she's watching him today so I can take a nap). I would so appreciate some advice or input or anything. I hope this is all in my head. I love my son more than anything or anyone in this world. ):

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Mary - posted on 04/21/2016

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Hi Jane, (lol)
Listen, you are maxed out. You are exhausted and I know exactly how that feels. Its awful. Some mothers can take the new baby/no sleep thing in stride..I was not one of them. I NEED my sleep. Every mother makes mistakes and that was yours. It is good that you feel so awful about it, it will prevent it from happening again. I'm sure he is fine though. You should really be reaching out and getting more help. You should also be sleeping/resting as much as you possibly can. I don't think anyone would doubt how much you love your baby or anything else. But it sounds to me like you need some resting time for yourself. I know (and don't think) you should forget what happened, but take it as a sign that you need help for right now. And there is no shame in needing more help so you can rest or nap.

Lupita - posted on 04/15/2016

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Hello my baby is 3 month old , i was formula bottle feeding since he was 1 month old but Suddenly he is started to Avoid Formula bottle feeding and started demanding on breast feeding
My nipples hurt but i know i have to do it since he wont take bottle . Also i don't feel like im not getting good supply has anyone had a similar problem?
When i try to bottle feed he trows all the milk away he wont drink it lol kind of funny in some way but its becoming an issue .thanks in advance for the help.

Paula - posted on 04/15/2016

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Baby colds are the worst becaus ethey can't tell you what hurts. I am a mom of 4 (two are twins) and I've been through many colds, lol. If he is pushing the bottle away but is clearly hungry, then he is probably congested. Do you have Little Noses saline? I learned with my first that saline is soon helpful with moving colds along. And a cool mist humidifier by his bed will do wonders. Babies are hard and don't come with instructions. You are doing the right thing in talking to your doctor. You also need to build up your strength. If visiting your mom every day so you can catch a nap helps, then do it for yourself! Think of how you feel when you have a cold. Your head hurts, your nose hurts, mucus can make your stomach sick…. your baby feels the same things. Don't stress so much. There are a lot of Moms here to help. :)

Raye - posted on 04/15/2016

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You can't destroy yourself with worry. There are a lot of horrible things that have same or similar symptoms to very common things. Shaken baby syndrome isn't usually caused by bouncing a child on your knee, minor falls or even rough play. So, most likely you didn't do any damage to your child. But you should still be careful when handling your baby. Each child is different, and no one can say how much force is needed to injure them. Googling symptoms is the WORST thing you can do, because you'll end up thinking you or your baby has a million different horrible maladies. Keep in touch with your doctor if you're concerned.

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