should i have a child just to please my partner

Michelle - posted on 02/08/2014 ( 3 moms have responded )

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should i have another child just to please my partner and possibly save my relationship?

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Ana - posted on 02/11/2014

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Having children, doesn't save a relationship. If your relationship is in danger, either work on it, or get out of it. Kids should come into the world during peace time amongst adults. Who wants to be pregnant and hating their partner. Pregnancy is a very emotional and dependent state of being for a woman. You really don't want to be by yourself if you don't have to be. Pregnancy during a bad relations effects you and the baby. Knowing all of this, why have a baby when your relationship is bad? Having a baby is going to make things worse...spending more money, mixing families, choosing a religion for the child, more responsibility for the parents, life changes-up all night, less date nights, etc...all to please someone who hasn't married you and agreed to be all in just as you are trying to be....Not me.

Chet - posted on 02/08/2014

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Very often people need to compromise when it comes to family size. My husband wasn't so sure about having a forth child. And I would have had a fifth, but I respected that my husband felt very overwhelmed - we had four kids born in five and a half years, and we also moved twice and my husband had to work away from home twice when number three and number four were babies.

That said, having a baby specifically to save a relationship is usually a bad plan. Young children place a lot of strain on a relationship, and if there are any underlying issues they can be magnified by that stress. Strong relationships can be made stronger by pulling together in difficult times, but more often relationships in trouble get worse.

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