Showing Affection and A Reflection on Differences in Families

Christie - posted on 10/25/2011 ( 1 mom has responded )

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Every morning, Dean and I see a mom about my age, maybe a little older, walking with her son (about 5th grade) to school every day. We see them each time we walk out from leaving Cam in the mornings. The son usually walks a few steps behind his mom, every once in a while next to her (yes, I do know that it's so normal at this age, kids not wanting to be seen with their parents, so that could be why he does so)...and they NEVER smile. Not even when we say 'Good morning' to them- and Dean cracks me up- he'll ALWAYS greet her, trying to MAKE her say something. For some reason, it makes me feel sad for her son, seeing them looking so serious every day. One day, for the first time, as we walked out, the boy was close to the door of the school, stopping every few steps and looking towards his mother, waving seriously (she was a few feet away, waving each time he did so), as if to make sure she was still there, showing a hint of a reluctance at leaving her. It was sweet, but a little sad, too. I wish she would smile at him. But, I guess we are not all the same, that love might be expressed in different ways in other families. The next day, it was back to their walking solemnly to the door...

If you have a 'child' who is in the 'don't show me affection in public' stage, did it hurt your feelings in the beginning, and does it ever still make you sad? Do you ever still feel sad at leaving them for the day?

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Katherine - posted on 10/26/2011

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I think everyone is different. My child shows a lot of affection but she is only in first grade. It is kind of sad, yes, but maybe that's just how it is in their family. Which I hope not.
Being in 5th grade is a whole new ball game. They don't want to be associated with their parents. Maybe the mom feels bad about this. But you never know.

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