Sibling rivalry

Tiana - posted on 10/10/2013 ( 3 moms have responded )

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Hi I'm new to the site and I'm looking for some ideas about dealing with sibling rivalry and one child has ADHD.

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Cheryl - posted on 10/12/2013

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Awesome, every child is special and unique... I've made and learned from enough mistakes, you'd think I'd be an expert by now?! It's nice meeting you!

Cheryl - posted on 10/11/2013

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I have four kids. My son was "Diagnosed" with ADHD of the inattentive sort, but really it is my opinion that everyone has that. I went through several IEP meetings, where I felt a little pressured even bullied, that my son should be on medication. Even though he never was a disruption in class or disrespectful to the teachers, they had concerns because he drew a "bubble monster" that alarmed the councilor, anyway I took the matter into my own hands and took him to a private councilor. One that had beliefs that were aligned with my own, where my son learned better techniques of dealing with frustration and self esteem. They just notified me that he no longer "qualifies" for IEP... I never believed he needed he needed it in the first place. Anyway, I'm not sure the ages of your children, but mine are 14,11,6, and 3 and it seems as though they are always pushing each other's buttons! I believe that they must work to resolve their conflicts and live together, I only intervene when I have to. I make sure to give each of them enough one on one time with both myself and my husband, which is kind of hard sometimes, but even if it's just during our waits in the car pool lines at their schools I'm sure to have conversations that begin with open ended questions...I ask why, how, what, where.. to really get them to talk to me about things going on in their lives, that seems to diffuse any jealousies or competitiveness. I also am a firm believer in family meetings. We all take time to talk about issues, letting each one discuss things that matter to them and give the offender a chance to respond, and encourage every one to think about what the speaker is saying. It sounds very Leave it to Beaver, but I swear it helps, starting that as a habit when they are really young and keeping the meetings to like ten minutes until they are older works wonders in our house!

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