Stay at home but don't want to be...?

Brittany - posted on 03/25/2010 ( 4 moms have responded )




Hi, I'm Brittany and I'm 20. For the past 8 months I have been at home taking care of my son. I had to walk out a job because of the stress it was putting on me and my fiance. I'm so eager to get back to work but can't find anything! I have been trying for 6 months to get back in the work field. I enjoy the time with my son and I love doing things around the house it's just, we are about to sign for our home and I feel so useless. I wish I could help my fiance. He's always paying for monthly payments of some debt I have. He's been doing it the past 8 months but I get so down on myself! ugh Any advice on what to do?? Thanks guys!


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Jacqui - posted on 03/25/2010




I know just how you feel with the feeling useless. I struggle with that all the time. But it sounds like your fiance might be the same as my husband--HE doesn't resent me for staying at home. It's all my issue! Anyway, just know, you're not useless staying at home. Rewards from taking care of a child are not immediate and hard to see in the present, but they are there!

Anyway, obviously you have to figure things out for what's best in your situation. But keep in mind that working means the added cost of daycare, travel, and likely more convenience foods because of the lack of time to prepare things yourself. Unless you can get stay-at-home work, for anyone with less than a white-collar job it is often hardly worth working, financially speaking, plus you add the stresses of less time, less ability to care for your family, and less contact with your son.

I have found staying at home with a young one to be a huge learning curve, which has often been frustrating and discouraging. But since realizing that for me staying at home was the wiser option, I just worked hard on changing my attitude and focus, and I am becoming happier. Just make sure you take all these things into account before rushing into a potentially unfulfilling job. It's actually a big decision to make! And as long as you're not in dire straights, learning to live on a little less can be a GOOD thing.

Sarah-Anne - posted on 03/25/2010




I wish i could tell you not to feel so bad about not contributing, but i feel the exact same way. i found out i was prego in july '08, got married the next month, and stopped working that december, not because of baby but because there was no work. my daughter was born in march '09 and i've been a stay at home mom ever since. i've been looking into working nights and weekends, but there is nothing. my husband and i also bought a house last july and are now having to pay off student loans. it pretty much sucks not helping financially. but the way my husband views it, if i did get a job and we had to put our daughter in daycare, we'd just be adding another expense. i'd have to make at least $500 a week to make it worth while. so for now i'm home. just know you're not alone.

Torey - posted on 03/25/2010




Hello Brittany,

Have you thought about working from Home? If you have then I would love to help you out with that.

I'm also a stay at home mom of 3 wonderful kids. During this past year I have started working from home to help out also with bills. I work with a wonderful group of other moms that are spread out through out the nation. I really love what I do and would love to talk to you more about it and let you know how it could benefit your family.

Please visit my website at:

Oh yeah. Don't beat yourself up because you are not working right now just keeping praying and something will come your way. It did for me.

God Bless.


Helping Moms Work From Home

Rebecca - posted on 03/25/2010




i wish i could help but unfortunately i'm in almost the same exact situation and i know how hard things can get. good luck sweetie

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