Stay at Home Mom Issues!!!!!

Megan - posted on 01/19/2010 ( 5 moms have responded )

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I am a stay at home mom, my son is almost 14 months and he is the greatest little guy. He is literally the perfect baby. He goes to bed at 9pm and wakes up at 10am and takes a nap at 2pm every day. He is very independent and he will go into his room and close the door and play for an hour or two with his toys. (we live in a small house 750 square feet and his door is right next to the living room, and i took his door knob off so all i have to do is look in and i can see him.) I love staying at home and before we decided to have a baby we discussed the fact that i am very commited to not leaving him in a daycare or with a babysitter due the simple fact that i had a child to raise him the way i want to. in the future the way he acts will be the direct effect of the way we raised him not the way a daycare or babysitter did.
My dilema is this: my husband works and he will be starting school soon. I am having problems with him being gone so often and i am a very outspoken person and have a very hard time keeping my emotions inside when i feel strongly about something. he is the most understanding, calm, and collected person i have ever known and that is why we are perfect together.
i have no desire to go out and hang out with my girlfriends like i used to before we had the baby because they come visit me at home a few times a month.
I worked for 3 months and my husband stayed at home and it was such a freeing experience after taking care of our son day in and day out from birth to 6 months. but looking back on that i dont like the way i acted. is this wrong, can anyone simpathize? i just need some ideas on how to deal with him being gone so much.

5 Comments

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Jessica - posted on 01/19/2010

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All of us need a break from our kids it is normal..I have been at home with ymine for over seven years..and my husband does come home and helps especially if I had a hard day with the kiddies..talk to yours and maybe take a day for yourself when yours don't have work or school and go out to lunch with the girls or something like that cause like a I said we all need to get away for a little bit and be us not mommy

Melissa - posted on 01/19/2010

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Ahh by 5 oclock I want a job just to get away! He he. One of my sweet girlfriends was honest with herself and said that she couldn't handle staying at home all day. So she got a family friend to babysit and she worked part time. You need a break from your kids if you SAH so talk to hubby to see when you could have some you time.

Ellen - posted on 01/19/2010

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I understand how you feel. I am lucky to have my husband home when our girls are awake. Then he's so beat that he can't (won't, doesn't...) help with them. The only day that he is truly around is on Sundays. So I try to make this a Daddy day. That means, Daddy does the baths, Daddy reads the books, Daddy gives the snacks and sometimes Daddy cooks dinner. (I still do the "fun" stuff like change the diapers, wash the faces etc.) This helps me in so many ways, but the biggest way it helps is it shows the partnership in raising our girls. I think this is probably the hardest part of being a stay at home mom, "the buck stops here" mentality. Our job is to raise our kids. We choose to do this and when our husbands our working so hard to support the family we loose alot of the partnership that goes into raising our kids. My brothers and their spouces all work, and I can see more of a partnership then in our family. Don't get me wrong, my husband is involved when he is here, but he works so hard at supporting the family that he simply isn't around to know our daily schedule, take the kids to the libary or things like that. So perhaps this is what you are missing also, the partnership of the day to day raising of your kids?

Jo-Ann - posted on 01/19/2010

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I feel your frustration! I too, spend most of my time on my own with the baby b/c my boyfriend is gone at work all the time. Like you, I'm very outspoken and opinionated and my boyfriend is very laid back, understanding and calm. Why we too make a perfect couple. Just hang in there, take deep breaths and know that you have the most important job in the world and your husband would probably love to switch positions with you. By him going back to school, he's only going to better himself for your joint future.

Laura - posted on 01/19/2010

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my son is exactly the same, my advise is 2 see if there are any postion in the school, like dinnerlady/classroom assistant, this is what i will be doing, if u go onto the shools website it should tell you about vacancies or speak 2 a member of staff, i have never took him 2 daycare or anything because i feel the same way, if i have a child i will raise him, hope this helps xx

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