Stay at home mom to a 2 1/2 year old...6 months pregnant very depressed

Rachel - posted on 02/06/2014 ( 2 moms have responded )

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I never thought I'd be writing in one of these but I'm so lost right now and have no where else to turn. I'm 26 and I just moved 23 hours from all my friends and family and quit my job of 8 years to move from Virginia Beach to Tulsa for my husbands job promotion. I always dreamed of being a stay at home mom but now that I am I feel selfish because I'm so depressed. I find myself constantly breaking down and having to hide from my son so he doesn't see me cry. I have absolutely no one to talk to all day...no friends...no family...I recently started going to church but their ages there are 50+. My husband doesn't understand at all. He says he works all day too but he doesn't get that he actually gets a lunch break and gets to talk to people. I've been searching for a job but once people see that I'm 6 months pregnant I never get a call back. People told me to do pampered chef or Mary Kay or whatever but I can't pay for my son to go to daycare in hopes that I might possibly get a sale especially when once again I don't know anyone. I feel so trapped and I just don't know what to do. I feel selfish for even complaining about it. My husband was in the military before we had our first child and I know there's moms who have to deal with this with out a husband at all for months and months....

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Casey - posted on 02/06/2014

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Hi. I sometimes feel the very same way, although not as often as I used to. My 3 kids are all two years apart so I understand the dynamic of having a toddler and being pregnant... I suppose to get to the point, what helped me most was to get out an do something that was my own. I began taking classes that were fun for me... I took pottery, oil painting, feminism mysticism, yoga, etc. in the evenings after my husband got home from work. Just a few hours a week helped immensely-- you could converse with adults, it was inspiring to me, and I felt like I had accomplished something and that I was an individual again. You may even make a friend. I also started to enroll my kids in some fun little activities like dance or art play at the community center at around that age-- or age 3. It would be like 30 min/week for 6 week sessions for 36$. That was helpful too.
anyway, best of luck to you! It does get better-- I think! You're wonderful and you are not selfish:)

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Mary - posted on 02/06/2014

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I don't really have time to write now, as I have 10 children. I just popped on here for the first time, as I am nursing the baby. First I just want to say you are doing the right thing by reaching out! You are not alone, all us moms are in this together. Another thing is you don't need to hide from your son. Emotions are a very normal part of pregnancy and life. When my little ones were wondering why mommmy was crying, I just said "I am having a Mommy Moment, everything is ok." Take a deep breath and try to enjoy this time with your son. It is a challenge but you are the best Mom for these two little ones! God could have given them to someone else, but He chose you because you are exactly what they need. It is hard to adjust to staying at home but you will find you can help with so much financial by staying at home with your littles. May God bless you as you adjust to your new roles!

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