Talking to my husband...need suggestions!!

Lauren - posted on 01/19/2010 ( 4 moms have responded )

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Currently I have 3 months of maternity leave left before I'm supposed to go back to work. My husband and I have decided it would be best for me to stay home which I'm delighted to do! Our daughter is now 9 months old and I ofcourse already have the baby bug. I've talked to my husband about having more children and he thinks I'm crazy for even suggesting such a thing. We are a young couple of 25, married 2 years and have been together almost 7. We bought our house 3 years ago and my husband has a wonderful job as a gas technician working for a local gas company. My view point is I would love our daughter to have a sibling, our house is already full of baby items and we are of an age that I know I could handle two kids better than if I was much older. My husband keeps telling me that he could do it again but he doesn't think he wants to yet when we talk to people about more kids he always seems to agree with me. How do I talk to him to find out if this is really going to happen or not?? Obviously what I'm doing isn't working!

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Lauren - posted on 01/19/2010

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Thanks for the suggestions so far. Hopefully in time I'll be able to get a definite answer from him. In the mean time I just wish he would stop flip flopping from yes we should to know we shouldn't have another baby, not saying anything to me would be much more appreciated...ugh men!!!

Jennifer - posted on 01/19/2010

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Just give him some time and keep working on him. Sometimes I don't think we give men enought credit. I mean when we are prego, we are pretty emotional and sometimes down right b*tchy. After the baby we are an emotional wreck also and the whole time our men are trying to comfort us, but don't always know how (sometimes because we don't even know how ourselfs) . Ask him if it is the baby he isn't ready for or the extra hormones that come with the pregnancy. Talking about all this may help make him feel better and more accepting.

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I don't really have any answers for you Lauren. However, if he isn't ready now, he may be in the future. He just might need some time. After all your daughter is young at nine months old. Maybe you could ask him why he doesn't feel ready for another child. Then listen to his feelings. He may feel that you both have all the time in the world to add another baby.

Katelin - posted on 01/19/2010

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He may just need a little bit of time. My husband and I always knew we wanted to have more than one baby. We wanted to have our second one by the time our first was 2. As the time approached I was the one who wasn't ready. But within a month or two I was all of a sudden ready and now we're expecting our second. They will be exactly 2 years apart.

So maybe a little time and casually talking about it...soon enough he may feel ready too.

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