terrible 3s HELP!!!

[deleted account] ( 3 moms have responded )

my little girl is at that age now shes 3 going on 13....theres not a day goes by she doesnt spend time in the naugty corner and i think shes spending most of the day there and dont no what else to do any ideas ???

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Helen - posted on 05/23/2010

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Sue why dont you set up a few activities where your lo can succeed like finding things in the garden, do a star chart and make it all about positive behaviour and hopefully go someway to breaking the negative behaviour attention link. Give her little treats each time she gets x amount of stars on her chart, or take her somewhere nice after a week of good behaviour. I think that would be a great idea.
Obviously still punish bad behaviour but just put her in the 'Naughty Corner' and leave it there, dont give her any attention for being bad. Try that for a few weeks and see if things change :)
I really hope this helps.
Let me know how it goes hunni x

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Caroline - posted on 05/24/2010

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I can relate so well! To say that my 3 1/2 year old girl is defiant is an understatement. Some days she spends so much time in her room for "time-outs" that I feel like a monster of a parent. My husband and I talk a lot and agree that consistency is key. We always follow through with threats and try to make a big deal of good behavior. Also, I'm not above bribery. It sounds awful but I bribe her with stickers, a trip to the park, a small piece of candy or cookie (this one I use only in desperate times), or some other activity she enjoys to reward good behavior. Plus she can have bragging rights if she is good; she can call Grandma or Auntie to tell them all about it. As far as the bad behavior goes, I make sure we talk about the incident in depth so she understands what she did wrong and why it is unacceptable.

I have no idea what the right thing to do is, ultimately. Maybe each child is different and therefore different techniques should be used. I thought for sure that I had been trying these things in vain (my daughter would stare at me with a blank face each time), until out of the blue one day she repeated everything back to me. It was the same speech I had given her over and over again. I was stunned!

Keep at it, whatever you are donig. Kids seem to learn from repetition so if you don't see immediate results try not to be discouraged. Another mom recently told me that with all three of her children, age 3 was by far the most manipulative age. I believe her wisdom may be applied to many other children as well.

Sorry to be so long-winded but I hope this helps in some way. I am also going through this so please know you are not alone. Good luck!

Caroline

Jennifer - posted on 05/23/2010

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I know how you feel, and I wish I could tell you that it gets easier. My little girl is 5. All I can tell you is stay consistant. If you tell her no for something, then stick with it, and don't ever let her get away with it. Also, try to give positive feedback to her whenever she is behaving good. Other than that, I have nothing else that I can say that will help. Good luck!

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