The joys of having girls ;)

[deleted account] ( 37 moms have responded )

I swear my 2 year old is the devil lol. She does not listen AT ALL. And she has such an attitude on her it kills me! Anything we tell her not to do... or to do she comes back with a little finger pointing at us and "NO". My son was much easier than my girls are.

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Jenni - posted on 08/07/2011

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You could try this little trick;

Let's say you want her to get dressed and expect her to tell you 'No!"

Instead of asking her to get dressed, make a statement: "Ok let's get dressed!" (getting dressed isn't up for debate) followed by a choice: "Would you like to wear this dress or these pants and top?"

Because of their developmental fight for independence, toddlers need many choices over the little things to feel some control over their environment.



Also try to change 'no' into a positive, rather than flat out saying 'no' like....

"Let's try this instead..."

"How about we do that after lunch..."

"I love your jumping, but let's jump on the floor instead of the couch..."



A lot of time it's the language we use that gets our toddler's to listen to requests. Also try referring to situations as 'we', as in... "we don't do that..." "we need to eat a vegetable... it's strange, but i've found referring to 'we' instead of 'you' helps.



But yes, it's definitely important that she feels some level of control over her environment. So reserve 'no' for issues of safety and respect. When she makes a request, respond with "I'll think about it.." before saying 'no'. Then decide if the request is unreasonable. When you do use 'no' stick to your guns but use it as a last resort. Ensure your house is childproof.



You could also try counting to 3. But save this method for when listening is imperative. You make the request and then count to 3. If she doesn't comply by the end of the countdown, repeat the request once more: "I asked you to get down, this is your last chance. Get down or you will find yourself in timeout (or removed)." Then follow through.

Latisha - posted on 08/14/2011

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This is precisely what I think of when ever I think of little girls that age. The hand resting on that jutting out hip, one foot tapping and the pointing finger while she tells you she is QUEEN of her little universe and you just happen to be her royal highnesses lowly subject! I have 6 kids and 5 of them are girls. Each of them very much have their own personalities, but they all have the queen of the world mentality. Wish I could say it gets better as they get older, but my 12 yr old, well, I will just say that attitude slowly changes but doesnt go away.
As for my only boy, by no means of the imagination will I say he is easier than my girls but there is definitely a difference in the things they do.

Amanda - posted on 08/08/2011

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I'd love to know where my daughter picked up painting herself in custard this evening coz it's not something the rest of the family make a habit of doing. We asked her why she covered herself in custard, her response, "acoz I did"
They do things just because they can not just from what they have learnt from others around them.

[deleted account]

She's with me nobody watches any of my kids for me... and I certainly dont act like that. Since she has been able to express herself and talk and walk she has been like this. While It drives me insane sometimes, she is a very strong willed stubborn person and thats alright. She is her own person.... I try my hardest to let my kids be their own person, and for that they are happy kids. The only thing I really dont "tolerate" would be getting rough or mean with my 8 month old, thats when I put my foot down.



Sorry if I sound harsh but it seems like the first response people have to something like this is "they are learning it from somewhere" I agree that sometimes that is the case, but in this situation my sweetie is just difficult at times.

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Susanna - posted on 08/16/2011

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I have 3 girls, age 6, 4, and 1. They each have their own personallity. If course my 6 year old is the boss and I have to encourage her to be a leader instead of a boss. My 4 year old has always been at her big sister's heals and acts out to get individual attention. She uses whining to get her way and I can see the tension in her body building up when she gets angry. I can imagine an ulcer building. My 1 year old is ripe for the molding. She has been my best acting baby so far, but I can see her independence breaking through already. This is the best age to really be consistent in their training. Not letting her get away with temper tantrums to get her way.
I love having girls. I can't imagine what I would do with a boy. I love playing with their hair and watching my 4 year old pretend to be the mom of her stuffed toys. I hope I can help them be a better woman than me.

Gillian - posted on 08/15/2011

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Yes, my 2 year old daughter is a control freak too and a shock to the system after two laid back boys who didn't care what they wore as long as someone was going to put the clothes on for them!

[deleted account]

Yeah I sometimes do also. I try to kind of blow it off because thats just her, but sometimes enough is enough. She likes to pull her baby sisters hair, baby sis is only 8 months old. I dont put up with that, she gets sent to the wall. But since she has been able to move, she has always been so indipendant with a take charge attitude. I really dont want to take that away from her I hope it stays with her all her life. I dont exactly feel like im messing up in raising her but some days it definantly can take its toll.

Mona - posted on 08/09/2011

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Brandi...I thought I was the only mother who have a toddler that is terribly misbehaving as she does, same issues, talking back, don't listen, fights back, destructive....I feel so @ a loss wondering where did I go wrong. I discipline her and it just don't help...glad u posted this because I feeling like a horrible mom.

[deleted account]

Both of my girls know what I will and will not put up with. I have been home with my children since day one but that doesnt stop my 4 yr old from spraying shave cream in the bathroom sink, or my 2 yr old from eatting peanut butter out of the jar after climbing onto the counter to get it. It doesnt stop my girls from trying to pull all of my makeup out and playing with it. They do get in trouble, and they still do things. No one taught my 2 yr old to scream like a wild animal when she wants something or doesnt get her way. Its how she cries naturally...has since the moment she was born. Example or no example they are their own people and will do their own things. Anyone who claims to have perfect children is either totally crazy in their own world, or they only have one child. My girls are good girls dont get me wrong. I love them to death. Out in public they are polite, honest and will bend over backwards to be the best little girls ever seen. But at home they are NORMAL, HEALTHY, HAPPY curious girls. Guess my house is just more "wild and crazy" since they are so close in age and I refuse to follow them 24-7-365 when there are other children to be cared for. Its what makes them who they are. I have not nor will I ever be an overbearing control freak of a Mom. I want my kids to think for themselves, but I do make punishment clear cut and dry and very consistant.



Edited to add: The overbearing control freak of a mom is my MIL not anyone person on here. And normally these messes are made when I am attempting something like dishes, dinner, or laundry and cant see where my kids are. My MIL makes it a point to tell my husband and myself how aweful some of my girls actions are.

Regina - posted on 08/09/2011

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they are huge magpies!!! trust me. i have three of the "little drlings" 12, 8, and 5 months. they pick up bad behavior everywhere, and way more often than they pick up good behaviors i might add. When my middle child was three she could repeat a 5 minutes section of spongebob that she had only seen twice (at her grandma's i must add because we chose not to have tv for this very reason). The baby already started showing a temper just like her oder sister has.

Jennifer - posted on 08/09/2011

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I have two boys, but I have friends that have girls their ages. My oldest is 2 and does the exact same thing. It is called a very willful child. You just have to keep consistent with it. Yes, that means sometimes never getting anything done until they take a nap or go to sleep. But, you need to stand your ground and just keep going. It is terrible twos, and some kids have it worse than others. My son has it bad, but he also started at 18 months. One thing I found out from my husband's speech pathologist is my son has the mentality of a 5 year old, but is two. So, he is smart and knows what he is doing, now I just have to teach him the boundries and what he can/not do. It may take a week of constant boundry setting, but it will sink it. I had to talk to the state and make sure what I was doing was appropiate because I have had to do it in public, but when he points at me, I smack his hand. When he hits me because he does not like my answer, I still smack his hand. It took about 3 days to a week for the pointing thing and he still has some spots that he does it, but the smacking out of anger has come to a stop with the exception of when he is really angry. So, you are on the right track, just keep going. STAND YOUR GROUND. They crave guidance and it is up to us as parents to show them the right from wrong. Good luck

Amanda - posted on 08/08/2011

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i have a 4 yr old son and a 9 mth old daughter and so far my daughter is the one that is pretty laid back and my son has a lot of attitude..lol

Desiree - posted on 08/08/2011

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I have five girls and though during each one's life they have been times of challenge. I have come to realize that they attitudes are sometimes a reflection of how we view or speak of them. My first of course was my "easiest" thus far; I however believe that this is because we usually are able to provide are first with more undivided attention and are able to spot warning signs more quickly. People around my 2nd always treated like a baby because she was always very small for her age even being mistaken for a younger sibling on a child in her preschool class and constantly people asking if she and her younger sister (by two years) were twins. I am still battling with her desire to act "like a baby" and that was three yrs ago. Comments about boys being easy or girls being harder will only make it true. Please be careful as children are VERY receptive of our opinions of them, even if we dont think they hear it or "understand", those attitudes can express opinions far louder than words. Good Luck

Sara - posted on 08/08/2011

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Hi Brandi,
I have two girls - one is 2 years old and the other is almost 7 months. I was having a really hard time with my oldest and received some really great advice from some friends:

You are the parent and know better than your child. The only way to stop the attitude and tantrums is to no tolerate them. My daughter knows that whining, fits, and a bad attitude will be dealt with quickly and is not allowed. We almost never have issues anymore!

Debbie - posted on 08/08/2011

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I have two boys and a girl. She is only 10 months old and she already worked out how to get her brothers told off. She will look to see if anyone is watching and go to the one who has the toy she wants and starts to cry, so we think they have taken it from her. I'm wise to her now can't wait to see what she's like as a teenager. It's nice to know that I'm not the only one who's daughter isn't an angel.

Tara - posted on 08/08/2011

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No, they definitely don't always just pick it up. I don't think any parent models "let's put cheezies in the dvd player and then smack our sister because she wants to eat the cheezie instead".



My girls pick at each other a lot - I'll probably have some huge dust-ups once the youngest starts talking more.



Of course, now I have my Dad to thank for my older girl's favorite answer to "why did you do that?" -- her response (gotten verbatim from my Dad) "because I can"

Stifler's - posted on 08/07/2011

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My son is THE devil. Neither my husband or I model the behaviours we have seen him come out with.

Laural - posted on 08/07/2011

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Who is watching her and teaching her this? She is learning it somewhere. My girls never did that stuff because it was not tolerated.

Darla - posted on 08/07/2011

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My 2 yr old does not listen either and if you tell him to do or not to do something if you get an answer it is NO. Not only does he not listen he is into everything and anything. Need to be a octopus.

[deleted account]

My son was breeze, so layed back and calm but my girls have givin me unbearable headaches, gray hair lol, its pay back for how I was growing up :)

Tamara - posted on 08/07/2011

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So strange my daughter has always been so much easier then my sons lol

Amanda - posted on 08/07/2011

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We get the shoe thing too. Must be a girl thing.
I do the count to 3 thing, I also give her the choices over food, clothes, shoes etc so she has a fair bit of control over little things.

[deleted account]

Yea my girls are always fighting over Daddy! I know. my daughter will even cry if they fall off in the car. I tell her we will get them when we stop and she screams like someone tried to kill her!

[deleted account]

Oh yeah my step daughter when she was living here and samara my devil, they fought over my husband, the man couldnt lay down around them because as soon as he did they were both on him and seconds later one is pushing the other the other is saying "Im sitting here!" hair pulling, all that. Its so funny with the shoes though its like they are her life line or something lol

[deleted account]

HAHA Brandi! We have the same fight with Elizabeth! First thing in the morning she strips down to her diaper and puts on her shoes of choice. She will cry if you take the shoes off even if your putting them right back on after getting dressed. She doesnt care what clothes she wears as long as you dont touch the shoes! My girls get options, but very limited. Other wise my 4 yr old would never get dressed because she changes her mind 10 times. Anyone else have the problem where they have more then one daughter and they cat fight all the time? Mine are always just doing little things to set off a yelling match or hair pulling fight.

[deleted account]

Yeah... see that works for my husband not so much me. I let her pick out things like juice o rmilk, cereal, crackers, some times her clothes but mostly I do that because if left up completly up to her she'd go every where in just her diaper and shoes. She moves from time outs no matter how many times I put her back,yet stands there when my husband tells her to. All in all she listens better to my husband than she does me. Really most of the time ,she wants nothing to do with me. She's a HUGE daddys girl.

Amanda - posted on 08/07/2011

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Same I'm dreading her turning 12 or 13 I just know if being nearly 2 is anything to go by I am in big trouble.
I take the kids to a creche at my gym and the girls that run it said they have never come across another child like her in the 20+ years they have worked in childcare.
Saying that for all her bossiness and attitude, the scowling faces and the tantrums, I wouldn't have her any other way. She looks like butter wouldn't melt with the blonde hair and big blue eyes, but it couldn't be further from the truth

[deleted account]

The crossed arms I get along with the extended leg and everything else just drives me insane. Some days I dont know wether to laugh or cry... some days I do both lol. I just wonder where she picks it all up from, she doesnt see anything like that, other than me telling them what they can or cant do so I get how she would maybe think she's also in charge? Lol. I like to call her the enforcer sometimes... I am a little scared to see how she is when she's older

Amanda - posted on 08/06/2011

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Brandi, my lil angels bossy too, she scared the life out of a 4 yr girl when she told her she couldn't have a turn on the slide coz she was on there, this little girl looked devastated and just walked off. When I went to call her name she turned round and said, no mummy I'm not bossy boots go away, turned on her heels and stood there arms folded with her back to me

[deleted account]

Both of my girls are drama queens. If the oldest skins her knee she cries and tells me she cant walk, it hurts so bad. #2 OMG she is even more of a drama mama. You calmly tell her no about something and she will cry like you just tried to kill her. My son if you tell him no then he just stops going for whatever and finds something else.

[deleted account]

thats so much easier to deal with than madam

Lol too funny. I wonder the same thing to with mine. She's a bossy little thing, and mean. I kiss her on the cheek or forehead and she wipes it off while saying eww! She is not at all into the whole affection thing, ill ask her "are you my girl?" "No" :( Ill say, "your so pretty" Instead of saying thank you she comes back with "yeah" Such a snot.

Amanda - posted on 08/06/2011

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Totally agree, my 22 month old daughter has the attitude from hell. I get the finger pointing and the scowling too, but she also tells me that I can't tell her what to do and she proceeds in telling me what I can and can't do. She is so strong willed and indeependant that I wonder why she needs me at all coz she won't let me do anything for her.
My son (3) is a handful too because he is always on the go, but thats so much easier to deal with than madam

[deleted account]

Yeah my husband says the girls take after me with the attitudes and facial expresions. My son for the most part is pretty quiet until he has a bone to pick. But my daughte... wow! lol

[deleted account]

My son is only 7 months old, but i can tell a difference from his attitude and mood compared to both of my girls at that age. It is amazing to me how the girls are much more take charge and my son is very laid back untill really pushed! HAHA The girls are to much like me and my son is just like my husband!

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