Thinking about having another baby!

Anna - posted on 10/20/2009 ( 29 moms have responded )

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We just had our first baby, 6 months ago and we are wishing for another one, however, it is very expensive this day in age and my husband is the only one working as I am a homemaker. My husband says that if we continue to wait then we will be waiting forever. Please help us make a wise decision. Thanks!

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Jennifer - posted on 10/20/2009

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Anna, do what your heart tells you! If you and your husband think it is right, DO IT!! As far as income goes, you can breastfeed if that is an option for you, child care is not a worry, reuse everything that you can, and if need other things borrow from family and friends and there are great consignment shops and sales all over these days. I don't know where you live but there is a great consignment sale called Just Between Friends (jbfsale.com) in almost all the states, where you can get great deals and a great way to meet moms in your area!! We have 3 kiddos and I quit my nursing job to stay home and trust me you can find a way to make it work, budget, budget, budget!!! Good luck!!

Cori - posted on 10/20/2009

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i wanted another baby when my son was 6 months old... but we weight the pros and cons of close in age kids and we are waiting until around 18 months to start trying again. i dont want to have another baby around just yet (or even in a couple months) to take away from the attention that i can be giving my baby... even though we both loved babies and love making them ;) figuring out a plan to wait until later was the best for us.. it satisfied my mothering side that wants babies around forever and it satisfied my husband knowing that our kids are going to be close in age but not right on top of each other

29 Comments

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Irene - posted on 10/25/2009

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i know what u mean. i just had one 4 months ago and i want another one to. i know it may be a very soon choice and i was told better to have them close in age rather then far appart so i only wanna give it a couplpe more months b4 i have another so i done have ppl upset with me for going for another one soo fast ( my mother inlaw) and but i also kinda miss being pregnant i miss the feeling of the baby kicking and moving around and such! and either way yes it is expensive but u do wanna give that child a sibling then go for it but that is totally up to u for the time being but good luck!

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I say go for it. Just like everyone else is saying, finances will almost always be stressful (unless you run into a load of money) but there are always ways to save money. My DH also works 10-13 hour days and I stay at home with our 14 month old daughter with one on the way. Although I may be anxious about having two in this economy, I know that I will love them and do my best to take care of them. Good Luck with your decision!

Loni-Jayne - posted on 10/23/2009

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Heya my partner is also the only one working my sons 11 months old i often think of havin another now but i think i want to give him all my attention and wait until hes at school so it will be abit easier lol x x

Kelly - posted on 10/23/2009

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We have 6 boys and I couldn't imagine the world without any of them. We only planned 2. It's not easy and since hubby is the only one working it can be difficult financially, but it's not impossible. If you really want another then don't sweat it. Enjoy each other and your baby and if it's meant to be it will happen. You will be amazed at how your baby will enjoy a new baby. All mine were (in turn) transfixed by the new baby. Good Luck.

Katie - posted on 10/23/2009

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Hi Anna,

You've received a lot of good advice so far, and I think I may have a few things to add.

As far as family finances go...If you're concerned, check out a financial guy named Dave Ramsey. Presently, he hosts a radio show, a TV show (on FOX Business), has several books runs a financial counseling company and has a program called Financial Peace University (usually available through churches). His focus is teaching families how to budget their incomes, live within their means, GET OUT OF DEBT (how much better would life be with NO monthly payments?) and save for the future. Borrow "Total Money Makeover" from the library. You'll be amazed at what you can do on one income if you're planning well.

You can also find out from your OB's office and hospital what kind of fees to expect for the pregnancy and childbirth (although you're probably pretty aware of this since you just had baby #1). Options like nursing and cloth diapers help to save money in the long run if you have the energy for them.

And use services like craigslist, garage sales, etc to find the things that you'll actually need 2 of.

Best wishes!

Christina - posted on 10/22/2009

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I think if you want to have a baby go ahead and try, by the time you have the new baby the little one will be 16 months. You can start saving money know by the time the new one comes along you should be able to aford the stuff it needs. Unless he don't make much money, But do as you please and good luck sincerly yours christina.

Beth - posted on 10/22/2009

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My take on it is that if you wait til you can "afford it" you will be waiting a long time. We're in the same boat but there are ways to make a little extra cash and if you follow a good budget, you can do it. The big expenses come when they start school and if they are close enough together you might be able to find work during school hours a few days a week to help save or have funds for those extra items. I worked out our 7 month old costs about $50 a week plus a few additions for toys and clothes. That will probably continue until she's out of nappies but having another soon, we'll just keep spending the money anyway. I reckon, build your family. They will give you more joy than having a few extra dollars a week. All the best.

Christina - posted on 10/22/2009

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My daughter just turned 17 months. We are planning on trying when the Holidays are done and over. We don't want the to be too far apart in age but then again we don't want them too close with them both in diapers. We want to potty train or first before the second is born. So say go for it if you guys both truly want another one. Who says you will get pregnant right away anyway.Good luck it's so exciting ;).

Jane - posted on 10/22/2009

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there is never a right time or enough money. do what's right for your family. my parents had 7, my mom stayed home. my husband's mom had 4, and she stayed home. 2 or 3yrs is a good space b/w kids.

Anita - posted on 10/22/2009

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I had all three of my boys within two and a half years. My advice is... you will adjust to more. It's never easy. It's never cheap. I would focus more on how it will effect family dynamics.

Jessica - posted on 10/22/2009

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seroiusly if want another child, go for it, i wanted another child too when my daughter was 6 months old and i was trying for well 2yrs and finally got pregnant, even known everything is expensive i know have everything i need for my children, but money is probably always going to be tight but i found at the end of the tunnel is there is always cheaper way of doing things

Chelle - posted on 10/22/2009

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im a stay at home mum and my partner goes to work i have a five and a half month old and am 8weeks pregnant. it was a planed pregnancy. i wanted two children close in age and lucky for us we fell pregnant within the 1st month of tryin. im very happy ill have two kids one 12months apart. i hope that because they are going to be so close in age they will play together well and share things. good luck with your dicision. take care x

Denise - posted on 10/21/2009

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When my daughter was 5 months I get pregnant again and we werent trying. Im due Dec. 5th and getting nervous to have 2 only 14 months apart but im excited. I think if your even thinking about it that that shows your ready. It was in my mind when I got pregnant. I stay at home to and I try not to worry about the money. Things always fall into place. That shouldn't stop you. Just dont try to hard from the start. If it happens then it was meant to be. Good Luck!

Kristy - posted on 10/21/2009

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I say go for it! Yes money is tight, yes the timing is proberly not right but if you keep saying that you will end up only having one child. My husband kept on saying ' no no, WE will wait' well WE ( not for my lack of asking) and ended up with a 4 and half yr gap, and that sucks!! I say goodluck and enjoy.

Lori - posted on 10/21/2009

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i am in the same boat. my son is 7 months old and my husband and i know we want another baby but im afraid that with only my husband working its going to take a toll on our already rocky finacial situation. my husband has the same attitude as most of you do..theres never really a right time and were not going to be a better place in a few years. plus were already in diaper/nap/diaperbag/ect mode!

Alicia - posted on 10/21/2009

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I say, if you feel ready, just start trying. What happens is what is meant to be! If you get preg right away or if it takes awhile, your kids will be perfectly spaced for YOUR family. Really, there are pros and cons to every age difference.

Michelle - posted on 10/20/2009

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Right of the bat i say go for it, you only live once, and the economy isnt getting better anytime soon. I have 2 boys one who will be 2 in nov and a 6 month old Im also a stay at home mom that does it all by myself day in and day out because my husbands deployed. Both my boys are in diapers its not to bad on expenses. Children are blessings and the joys of our lifes. having them close in age is great cause they grow up together. I have 3 other siblings we all were 6-7 years apart when we were born i talk constantly to only ONE sister because were all so spead out on the age range. Like you my son is almost 7 months old and we would like a 3rd a GIRL hopfully adding the "9" months of pregnancy my son will be already a yr and a half so. Its up to you and your hubby to make the right choice. I still stay go for it.

Dianne - posted on 10/20/2009

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Thank you for asking the question, i am in the same dilema, plus i am already 38 (my son is 4 months old), i had a difficult pregnancy but easy birth and recovery Thank God. All whom i have talked to tell me to stop taking birth control between 6 and 9 months and then start trying, so if all goes well the kids will be at least 18 months apart. Money will always be tight once you have kids. My hubby is the one worried about being able to provide as the sole bread winner, but it is better to be able to reuse things that are not old and musty. I too shall endevour to become a bargin hunter. Good luck and I wish us all the best - have fun trying, LOL

Carrie - posted on 10/20/2009

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Weigh the pros and cons..... It took me 10 years to get pregnant after my first child! Then another 4 for my third. It does not always happen when you want it too. I think money issues for most people will always be around. Bargain hunt! I knew after my third child that he would be my last so I became a pro bargain hunter...lol. I think it is alot harder trying to find individual time for each child when they are far apart. I have a teen, a pre k and a 1 year old. All in VERY different stages. I'd say..... GO FOR IT!

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We are also a one income household, and we are thinking the same thing (my son is 10 months old). You need to look at the expense of having a second (remembering that you maybe able to reuse cot/clothes stuff like that for the next baby, as well as the costs of formula, nappies etc, and see if you can afford the increase. :) hope this helps

Betsy - posted on 10/20/2009

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Like Stephanie said.. If people waited until they were financially ready to have children.. No one ever would! Haha.. Not saying you should pop out 10 more, but you know what I mean. My son is 5 months old and my husband and I have agreed that we will start trying again when he is 9 months old. If you think about it.. Our son will already be atleast 18 months when the new one arrives. People sometimes forget to add that 9 months. We are hoping to have 4 kids, and if we waited until each child is 1 to start trying again, they would grow up so far apart in age that I'm worried they would have nothing in common (that's how my family was). So.. Obviously it is up to you and your husband, but I think you should wait a couple more months and let the fun begin! Hope everything works out for you!

Bethany - posted on 10/20/2009

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We are also a one-income family by choice, and definitely on the lower end of the income level chart. =) But I see life as a gift and children as a blessing. If you are ready for another one emotionally and physically, then go for it! There are ways to keep your living expenses down in order to care for more children. I agree with your husband. If you wait for circumstances to be "perfect," you'll be waiting a long time.

Sarah - posted on 10/20/2009

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My sons are 15months apart and I think it was the best decision we made! They are best friends, and they learn so much from each other. I think if you wait sometimes there's never a good time, especially when it comes to money. It hasn't been easy and money is often tight but it has it's other rewards. I also found my children got along better then children with a bigger age gap. Its big decision, good luck!

Alison - posted on 10/20/2009

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i know exactly how you feel... i had a son 3 months ago to the day and i am already wanting to have a baby girl... and i am a stay at home mom as well... my boyfriend wants the same thing, but we also know it is going to be difficult, so we decided that if it was ment to be then it will happen if noth then it will happen when the time is right... hope this helps

Lindsay - posted on 10/20/2009

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Im also Struggling with this too!! I have no idea what to do--my baby girl is 18 months and my son is almost 4.
I say do it!!

Stephanie - posted on 10/20/2009

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I have a 9 month old and I am due in Jan. with my second baby. My husband is the only one that works and I stay home. Our second was a surprise, but I'm glad she is coming along. If you wait until you are financially stable enough or "ready" you will be waiting forever. I say, go for it.

Cory - posted on 10/20/2009

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I know the feeling...my little girl is 14 months old. We want another one, however we are waiting until she is 18 months to start trying..We are planning on having her potty trained before we have the next one so that it will be less expensive on diapers. good luck on your decision....

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