Trapped

Kristina - posted on 02/13/2010 ( 1 mom has responded )

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My mother in law visits from the other side of the country often and at all the important dates like VALENTINES DAY, and every other holiday. i know I'm supposed to be nice, but she's an irresponsible adult, and I'm not having her watch my kids while my husband and i go out. I have my mother here to watch them instead, but then mother in law gets offended, and my husband gets mad because he's stuck in the middle. So i feel trapped. i can't go out w my husband when she's here. What should I do?

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Laura - posted on 02/13/2010

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Can you come up with a way to both go out and be with her by chance? What I mean is, are there any places where you could all go together (you, your husband, your kids, and your mother-in-law, and your mom together) and then both mothers could hang out with the kids while you and your husband slip away for some time togehter. I know it's the middle of winter right now, but something comparable to going to a park and leaving the kids and moms to play while you and your husband take a walk or something of the like might be doable. I know it's not a lot of time or a fancy dinner/date night, but it might allow for some happiness for everyone and you could actually enjoy your time together with your husband without having anyone get upset. Plus, it would be easier to play that off as a big family time event with both grandmas so that nobody gets offended and the kids are taken care of by a responsible adult simultaneously! :) This set up might also work at a mall or something where you and your husband would be close but still away from the kids for a bit, and the grandmas could work together at watching the kids there too.

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