WHAT SHALL I DO

Nicole - posted on 11/20/2012 ( 2 moms have responded )

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ME AND MY BOYFRIEND HAVE 5 KIDS TOEGTHER HE WORKES NIGHT SHIFT, AND DURING THANKSGIVING AND CHRISTMAS HE WORKED DAY SHIFT. HE GOES OUT ATLEAT 3 TO 4 TIMES A MONTH WITH FRIENDS AND IM HOME DAY AND NIGHT UNLESS, I RUN TO THE STORE WITH MY MOTHER OR WALK TO A STORE. EVERYWHERE I GO I GOT MY KIDS, TO MY MOTHERS HOUSE, TO THE KITCHEN THE BATHROOM, OUTSIDE TO GET THE MAIL, SLEEPING IN BED, ANYTIME I TRY TO BE ALONE I HAVE THEM, I CANT SLEEP AT NIGHT BECAUSE OF MY 7 MONTH OLD, AND I CANT TAKE A NAP BECAUSE OF MY 2,3,AND 4 YEAR OLD. MY 6 YEAR OLD GOES TO SCHOOL. MY BOYFRIEND ON THE OTHER HANDS TAKES NAPS, SLEEPS THROUGH THE NIGHT, UNLESS I MAKE HIM WAKE UP, HE GETS AWAY BY WORKING. HE'S OFF ON THE WEEKEND BUT STILL MANAGES TO FIND WORK TO WHERE HE'S GONE ALL DAY AND IM HOME WITH 5 KIDS. IM DEALING WITH CHANGING PAMPERS, CRYING, FIGHTING, AND CONSTANTLY DOING 4 GIRLS HAIR EVERY WEEK, SO IM EXHAUSTED, IM TIRED, I WANT A BREAK. WHEN I ASK HIM TO WATCH THE KIDS SO I CAN SLEEP, HE FALLS ASLEEP FIRST, WHEN I COOK, HE'S SLEEPING, SO I HAVE TO FIGHT THE KIDS TO GET OUT THE KITCHEN SO THEY DONT GET BURNED, WHEN I WANT TO STOP BY MY MOTHERS HOUSE JUST FOR A SECOND, LITERALLY A SECOND, I HAVE TO TAKE ALL THE KIDS, EVERYWHERE I GO THEY COME. WHEN I LEAVE HE SLEEPS AGAIN!! I FEEL MY RELATIONSHIP IS COMING TO AN END AND I DONT WANT IT TO, BUT I CANT TAKE THIS ANYMORE, IM TIRED MY LIFE IS A ROUTINE, NOT THAT IM COMPLAININ ABOUT MY KIDS, BECAUSE IM NOT, THEY ARE MY LIFE. I JUST WANT ALITTLE HELP AND SUPPORT, WHY CANT I GET HIM TO WATCH THE KIDS FOR A LONG PERIOD OF TIME? WHY CANT I GET HIM TO GET HIS OWN KIDS FOR AWHILE? HE LIKE A SPOILED CHILD, AND ITS SAD, CAN SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME? IM AT MY BREAKING POINT.

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Nicole - posted on 11/24/2012

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(Laughing) I'm sorry about the caps, just use to it. I've tried sitting him down, I've tried nagging i've tried it all, but it just seems as though it goes in and out. I've broken up with him, I'm out of fresh options, i want to leave but my heart is in this way to deep. I love him, but i'm also thinking of just giving it up. I would say he works 50%of the time, sleeps 30% of the time, and hanging out 15% of the time, which 5%of his time with the kids. Me its different, i'm with the kids 100% of the time, sometimes i don't sleep for days when their sick because they aren't sleeping. I just feel alone in this, i mean he does something, but i don't think its enough. The counseling thing it might work, if he goes.

Michelle - posted on 11/20/2012

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Have you spoken to him properly instead of nagging? Let him know how you are feeling. Maybe get some counseling to help you both understand what the other is thinking.



If it was me I would just walk out and leave the kids with him for a few hours. Even if you have to sneak out when none of them are looking.



Just a hint though: Don't type in all capitals as it looks like you are yelling at us.

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