Why don't stay at home moms go back to work after there kids go to school?

User - posted on 08/30/2014 ( 7 moms have responded )

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I don't get it. When a stay at home mom has a kid and the kids go back to school why dosnt mom go back. I mean the kid is in school 8-3 what are you doing all day? When I was growing up my mother worked full time. And she had the house cleaned just as any other stay At home mom did.i Mean I hear a lot of other mothers say if they work full time they don't have time to cook dinner or clean they house. What about the children by the time a child starts 1st grade they are 6 I mean they can't learn to do simple cleaning like wiping down the door with a a Clorox wipe or dusting the shelves. Or why can't an 8 year old vacuum the carpet or do the dishes
Or a load of laundry. Or why can't a 11 year old boil pasta for dinner. I am fully supporter of stay at home moms I just don't understand why mothers who have children over the age if of
6 don't work.

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Mitzieyanez09 - posted on 09/04/2014

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I actually did the opposite. Last year my son started kindergarten and I became a stay at home mom. Part of me would love to go back to work but the benefits of having me at home for my son and our family completely out weigh the benefits of being in the work force. The benefits are all the same ones Chet posted. The quality of life my son and we as a family have now is sooooooo much better. As for what a sahm does while the kids are at school......lol. The list is shorter if you ask us what we don't do. It's a personal chose based on different reasons for different families. I'm happy with my decision. Especially today that my son is just too tired to attend his third day of senior kindergarden and we have the option to let him sleep in and stay home or drive him in to school after lunch. It's the small things in life that have the greatest impact.

Chet - posted on 08/30/2014

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Not that SAHMs need to defend what they do, but I'll try to explain it:

The school year is roughly 180 to 190 days in Canada and the US. Our kids are off for a little more than 2 months in the summer, nearly three weeks at Christmas, a week in March, and lots of random days through the year when the teachers have professional development days. Even when kids are in school there are a huge number of days that they aren't actually at school. If you're working, and have multiple children, cobbling together childcare for all of that time can be expensive and a pain in the butt. Plus, it's nice to be able to spend the time off from school together as a family.

If you do some of the cooking and cleaning and errands during the day, evenings and weekends are freed up for family time. Most nights, our children are read to for an hour at bedtime and no matter how much our kids helped around the house I don't think we'd have time for that if we had both parents working full time.

There are also a lot of incidentals that come up and it's easier to deal with those if there is a parent at home. I'm thinking of things like a sick child, a dentist appointment, a kid forgets their ukulele and calls to see if you can drop it off at the school, etc. If a teacher wants to meet I can go over to the school at her convenience no problem. If we're waiting for an appointment we always get in fast because with a parent at home we go on the cancellation list and can usually take anything that opens up. If the kids want to do an activity that requires a weird pick up or drop off time it's not a problem for us.

Last year one of our kids did an immersive language program, and although a bus was provided the schedule was INSANE. He got to sleep in for an extra hour in the morning and he got home an hour earlier (except on Wednesdays when he got home four hours earlier!) because I was available to drop him off and pick him up. Had I been working there is no way I could have handled the pickup and drop off schedule and he would have had to be on the bus at 7am and not gotten home until 4:30 or 5pm.

I also like that I'm available to be involved with the school. I volunteer a full day a week in the library. I make costumes for school presentations. I help out with special events. I go on field trips. I always make homemade food for parties. I'm happy to help, but it also means that I am personally acquainted with all of the teachers and all of the kids at the school (it's a small school). And as a parent, it's hugely beneficial to know your kids' friends, classmates and teachers.

Our kids also come home for lunch. It helps to break up the day for them. Not a lot of kids can walk home for lunch any more, but it's good for our kids to get out of the school, have a walk, and touch base at home during the day.

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Mitzieyanez09 - posted on 09/05/2014

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Judgment is made by people who don't bother to ask questions. If we are here to help and support let's not take offence but do our best to answer the questions asked. Thanks for asking Maria. Hope some of the posts have answered your question.

Ahndrea - posted on 08/31/2014

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I just wanna clap for Chet ! When I first stumbled on this post I was a little offended then I read her reply and I just wanna say thank you and you go girl!

Lori - posted on 08/31/2014

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once my kids went to kindergarten, I began working part time with flexible scheduling so I could be home during the summer, etc. I realize not everyone has that ability but I needed the comfort of rebuilding my career.
i am glad i stayed home while they were toddlers however.

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