What is Parental Alienation?

[deleted account] ( 5 moms have responded )

Do your part to get your local community aware of this problem!

Did You Know That...

Parental Alienation is a form of Child Abuse?

Parental alienation (or Hostile Aggressive Parenting) is a group of behaviors that are damaging to children's mental and emotional well-being, and can interfere with a relationship of a child and either parent. These behaviors most often accompany high conflict marriages, separation or divorce.

These behaviors whether verbal or non-verbal, cause a child to be mentally manipulated or bullied into believing a loving parent is the cause of all their problems, and/or the enemy, to be feared, hated, disrespected and/or avoided.

Parental alienation and hostile aggressive parenting deprive children of their right to be loved by and showing love for both of their parents. The destructive actions by an alienating parent or other third person (like another family member, or even a well meaning mental health care worker) can become abusive to the child - as the alienating behaviors are disturbing, confusing and often frightening, to the child, and can rob the child of their sense of security and safety leading to maladaptive emotional or psychiatric reactions.

Most people do not know about Parental Alienation and Hostile Aggressive Parenting until they experience it. Parental Alienation Awareness is put forth to help raise awareness about the growth in the problem of targeting children and their relationship in healthy and loving parent/child bond.

We need your help to protect the innocent, ...the children.

We need your help to educate and make aware to the public the effects of Parental Alienation and Hostile Aggressive Parenting.

If you've been affected by Parental Alienation or know someone who has, or are a past victim of a parent who exhibited Hostile Aggressive Parenting, please write and tell us your story. We will add your story to our letters page for everyone around the world to publish in their local magazines, newspapers, etc. Please remember to keep your story to the telling of the confusion, loss, love, and heartache. Please refrain from excessive anger and verbally assaulting anyone in your letters.

The aim of the Awareness is to make the general public, judges, police officers, mental health care workers, child protection agencies, lawyers, as well as friends and family of the targeted children or their parents become aware of this growing problem.

With awareness comes education and understanding, and the power to stop the abuse of innocent children caught in the crossfire of people they love.

Source: http://www.paawareness.org/


Taryn - posted on 12/28/2013




I read Katherine's story. Its so sad, and I hope things will turn around for her.
I believe this is happening so much, and to so many people, and it's so wrong.
In my case it was my own mother, who has done, basically the same thing to my daughter, who is now 24. She doesn't even speak to me anymore, but ofcourse my mother is very much a part of her life. When she was young, my mother did the same thing in front of her, and has finally stopped. Now she just doesn't talk about me at all to my daughter. But my daughter doesn't talk to me, or about me. My mother would always put me down, her words cut like a knife, and definetly were inappropriate in front of my then 8 year old daughter. My mother was emotionally and verbally abusive to me. Unfortunately I needed her to financially help me in raising my daughter. It literally backfired. So I wish I had some comforting words, but I myself am wondering if I will ever have a relationship with my daughter , after all that has been said an done in her upbringing. My advise is don't give up, keep trying to get through to your daughter, anyway that you can. Be strong. I wish I had taken my own advise when my daughter was younger. It seems impossible.
But keep the faith, and always follow your gut.

Sheryl - posted on 03/25/2010




I wish we could get the word out about this more cause its happening all the time!


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Katherine - posted on 03/10/2012




I have a 17 year old daughter, my only child. I stopped working when i had her and cared for her all her life.

My ex husband has psychological issues and i did not leave the marriage years ago as i felt i would be deserting an unwell person.

Finally, 2 years ago i could not stand the relentless verbal abuse anymore. I felt as though i could no longer stand the torment or i would go crazy! I also wanted my daughter to see that no man should ever treat a woman this way.

Over the last year my daughters language to me is identical to her fathers. She rarely stays with me, but calls me when she has panic or any problem or wants a daily ride hime from school. Usually she texts so he wont hear her speak to me. When she is with me now, i feel sick all the time. She mimics total oppositional behaviour to me and is constantly telling me how much my ex hates me, and has every right to-- that i am ugly, a 'loser' ( i quit a career as a lawyer to move out of jurisdiction and marry him )... And here i am, feeling paralysed in anguish. My ex swears constantly and it has now become the new language of my daughter.

I feel that my daughter fears losing her father and stays ever the closer to him. She knows that i am always there for her.

Whenever she is with me, say as we are about to have dinner, he texts her, she insites a rage at me out od the blue, and uses it as an excuse to leave.

Now he is buying her a puppy!

I am not a stupid woman but i am posting this because i want desperately to hear from anyone else who has experienced anything like this. I do not live in the USA.

I feel as if my daughter has to actively and constantly find things to say about me that are negative and invented, in order to justify her rage at me.

We were so close and i know she wants to be able to love her mother still. It becomes worse every single day.

I have taken her for therapy for 2 months now, and i can see the strain on her face.

It is hard work to be so relentlessly evil.

Her father tells lawyers and anyone who will listen, what a horrible and foul mouthed mother i am. He gloats that our daugter 'picked' him and tells everyone that he has done everything to encourage our daughter to spend time with me. This is utterly surreal.

Please share if you are able...anything.

Thank you


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