Defamation ONline??

[deleted account] ( 8 moms have responded )

Ok ladies I know this is going to read strangely but I cant go into much of the background of my situation for legal reasons, much as I'd like to. But suffice it to say that my situation with my SK's BM literally could not be any worse. I am literally terrified of her. Read between the lines if you will.

So the problem I'm going to talk about here is the least scary thing she has done in 7 years but after the sheer hell we have all barely survived it's kind of the last straw.

I was thinking about going on Twitter but due to all the issues I have suffered from her on FB I wanted to check if she was on it before I started, as if she was was, I wasnt going to do it. I didnt know that this kind of search brings up that person's Live Feed thingy. Hers came up and I nearly peed my pants trying to shut it. Anyway.... before it closed I saw some 'tweets' on there from very recently that can only be described as lies/ defamation/ threats/intimidation etc- now this is probably not that shocking since clearly she's the ex and I'm the wife so... but I have literally had nothing to do with her for over 3 years. I dont even go to drop offs etc. So I thought what the?? and thought well I may as well see if there's anything else this offensive on there and well there was worse stuff. Oh she was smart enough not to actually use my name, but it doesnt take Einstein to know who she's talking about when I'm referred to as her ex's wife!! Now I dont mind people bad-mouthing me if what they are saying is true. But she is putting this stuff onto a medium which cant be deleted and can be read by people who dont even know me and it is sheer fantasy! Also some of what has been said seems to be in response to stuff I have written on here. Does anyone know if you can see people's posts on this community if you have been blocked by that person on FB- I thought she wouldn't be able to as I have blocked her??

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Julia - posted on 11/15/2009

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not sure what are you are in, but I would recommend you contact Angela Wolf at Gestalt Mediation. She is a life coach, and certified co-parenting instructor. She has experience with internet slander and has a very immense grasp of legal procedures regarding this stuff. If you should contact her, let her know Julia Moreno of Joshua Rose Foundation referred you. Her website is at http://gestaltmediation.com
Hope this helps. If you need more direct info, you can also add me on skype at mom4mykidz and get some more direct info so I can give you more direct guidance based on your state. Angela and I know quite a few people across the country with different areas of expertise and background.

Desi - posted on 11/15/2009

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I would be clueless to tell you the truth! I have trouble respond to my Sk qustions and I known my Sk since 2 1/2 months old! Its been 5 yrs for me and bio still hasnt let up on anything and bio has been married for 3yrs! But that is heart breaking that she say that in front of the kids! I can only wonder what my Sk is being told! Like i said before i dont like to put to much out there because of court issues, ect. but Its nice to know that someone else is going thro the samething but i wish we didnt have to! The sad thing is when i entered this marriage i though being a stepmother would be great, I had no problems with the bio we even went to the same school, i just didnt know her all that well i was a few grades ahead of her and was in way to many sports. But Things dont work out the way you hope for. I just wanted it to work out for all the kids, mine, sk and sk's other siblings! I hate when kids have to live double live just to please the other parent! =[ but thanks for writing back and i hope you have a wonderful week to come!

[deleted account]

Desi you poor girl, I so feel yr pain and yr right, the only thing that makes me feel good about it is she has shown, in a very public way, that she hasn't moved on and that she is just as unwell as she was 7 years ago. And I have the same thing, I'm not referrred to by my name either- it's usually 'that thing' 'that F'ing slut' or 'that c*Nt'- which again, I wouldn't mind so much (after all who cares what she thinks of me) but that's how she addresses me to the kids. Which is usually how I find out because it results in one of them saying something like 'Mandie, what does f'ing slut mean? That's what mum calls you' Charming. How do you respond to that??

[deleted account]

Miss Holly thanks for your thoughts you girls keep me sane LOL! I have rpeorted this incident to her Parole officer and we'll also be applying for a new Domestic Violence order- not that it will stop her of course but at least she will be dealt with the next time she does it- which will no doubt be straight after her Parole officer has talked to her. Please God keep my oldest boy safe when she finds out- his life will be hell becuase she will interrogate him for DAYS even though he knows nothing about it. Yes I have copiied the tweets and they are on their way to her Parole officer as we speak. And yes we will be taking it with us on our next Court date- fingers crossed that it helps. I'm glad I restrained myself from publicly reacting but gosh it would have felt good to rip her a new one on line LOL xoxoxox

Desi - posted on 11/15/2009

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My SK's Bio does the same thing to me on facebook, the only way i know is because we both are from the same town and we know the same people! She call's me sk's name's stepmother or husbands name wife or Sk'sname father wife! Personaly I dont think the Bio's like that their kids have a new women in their childs life and that we pose a threat to them as a replacement or it can just be plain J! First I blocked her from FB then she found me on Circle of mother, she wanted to add me to both even after writing to me on CoM an let me tell you it wasnt anything nice! An no she can not read what you right on you wall or on a friends wall but she can read when you comment on a friends picture! She can still find you on CoM but just set you privacy to only friends! I still am trying to see how I can block on myspace but I havent had any luck! I dont like to write on her either but If the bio wanted to she could come on here and see what iv writen! but I wish you the best of luck and dont let her get to you, she is just showing people that she is a nag and loves to dog on people because she has nothing better to! Have a good one! =)

[deleted account]

Oh Mandie!!! I know what a struggle this woman has been for you! I thought you were not allowed to post anything like that for legal reasons, so why can she? If nothing else, you could try to sue her for libel (written untrue defemation of character for the sole purpose of hurt). I don't think I would go that far (yet), but you could go back on there and "collect" all the horible things she's been saving (who's to say she can see who looks at her live feed? I'm not sure about Twitter, but I can't see who looks at my FB, even though it's on private). Do you know how to save a "screenshot" on your computer? It's basically where your computer can take a picture of what's on your screen and save it as a picture document. If nothing else, it's more evidence against her in the custody battle (it could lead to potentially proving PAS - who knows what lies she's telling the kids if she's willing to tell the lies to strangers on the internet?). I save all that kind of thing that my daughter's bm does, and I see it as the bm doing more good than harm to me since I now have everything she lies to people about on record...



Good luck hun, and just keep in mind that you are ALWAYS being the better person - and I TRULY believe in KARMA!!! :D Just send me a mesage if you need someone to talk to!

[deleted account]

Thanks Latisha, at least I know now. To be honest I'm not sure why I'm so upset, it's far and away the least bad thing she's done to me, I think I just got a fright because I wasn't expecting it.

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