Step-Mom took my daughter to get her ears pierced and is talking bad about me to kids

Deborah - posted on 04/20/2011 ( 3 moms have responded )

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I would like to get feedback from others that may be dealing with the same situation. I have 60% Custody and my ex-husband has 40% custody of our 3 children. It is spring break so, he gets them for a week and then I get them for a week. The first day that they went to his house for break. The step-mom took my youngest daughter to get her ears pierced. I was not consulted about it and the father was not even there for the event. Just the step-mom. Who, signed the consent form as the parent. (fraudulently)
Now, she is saying everything she can to the girls making me seem like the bad person because I was upset over the whole issue. I do have proof of the bad-mouthing of me. I've done some research and found out that even though she thinks she has full legal rights that in all actuality she has none. What would you do? I feel like she is trying to make my kids turn against me.

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Louise - posted on 04/20/2011

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Did she do this ear piercing because you said no and your daughter wanted them done? This is just point scoring on her behalf and is pathetic. I think you have a case for physical abuse because she does not have parental consent. I would speak to a lawyer because this is not right. But, before you go that far talk to your ex and see what he says about this bad mouthing that is going on.

This woman is obviously insecure, but bad mouthing is not the way to win the hearts of your children.

Personally if this was me I would have a pink fit if someone had taken my daughter to have her ears pierced without my knowledge this is over stepping the mark.

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CRYSTAL - posted on 03/23/2013

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I Just Had This Same Thing Happen 3 Days Ago!! I Have Physical Custody, Ex Has Visitation. He ASKED My 5 year Old If She Wanted Them Done, She Said Yes, But My Mom Said I Can't. We Are Pentecostal And Goes Against Religious Beliefs. (For The Record, I Am NOT Forcing My Religion Onto My Child!! But I AM Raising Her In Church. I Will Not Do Anything To Her That Cannot Be Undone Bc I Want Her To Make An Educated Decision HERSELF When She Is Mature Enough) Anyways, My Ex Then Sent Her w The Current Fling, (Technically WIFE, But This Would Be His THIRD In 7 Years!)

Deborah - posted on 04/20/2011

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Louise, thank you so much for your response.
No, I had never said no to my girls about getting their ears pierced. I have always told them when they were ready to have it done to come to me and let me know and I would take them. My 8 yr old got hers done with me last year. The other 2 were not ready yet. To me, it is their decision weather they wanted it done or not and it is a BIG occassion for a Mother and a daughter.
I had tried to talk to my ex-husband about this and he refuses to talk to me. Said the fighting needs to stop and he's not dealing with it. These are our kids. I think I did the right thing of stopping trying to make this lady understand my point of view and to understand that she had no right to do what she did and talk to my ex. But, since he won't talk to me about it I don't know what to do.

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