3 yr old daughter has turned into a hellian

Shayla - posted on 04/01/2013 ( 3 moms have responded )

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Hi. My daughter is 3. Turned 3 in Dec. Here lately she is so mouthy. Just the way she speaks to me about anything she has a major attitude. She has tons and tons of clothes and toys. Spoiked, yes she is. I am guilty of it myself along with my mother and gma. She seems to be so unappreciative of everything I buy her or do with her. She whines about EVERYTHING. She throws tantrums if she hears the word no, not right now, or if she just plain doesn't get her way. I don't know what to do anymore. She doesn't listen. I'll ask her to do something 10 and 15 times before she will actually do it. Also, she asks me the same question over and over and over and over again....oh and over and over and over...u get my drift...in a row. I answer her the first, second, third and sometimes up to the 5th time. I know she is super smart. She knows what I'm saying. OMG someone please help!!!!!

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Elfrieda - posted on 04/02/2013

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With the asking questions over and over and over, I've had some luck with my 3 year old asking it back to him. I tell him, "We're going to Grandpa and Grandma's house, let's get in the car!" Hurray, etc, he rushes to the car babbling about Grandpa and Grandma, and then as soon as we start moving, he asks, "Are we going to church?" Um, no. Grandma and Grandpa's house. Silence for a few seconds. "Are we going to the library?" And on and on, it's like being trapped in the car with Dory from Finding Nemo!

Finally I clued in that he's just trying to make conversation, but doesn't know what to say. So I ask him, "Hmm, I wonder. Do YOU think we're going to the grocery store?" and then he laughs and shouts that no, we're going to Grandma and Grandpa's house. Then we talk about something else, which is not as pleasant to me as silence, but oh well.

So my point is, if she asks you a question more than once, turn it around and have her answer it.

Amy - posted on 04/01/2013

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Well if you've always given in then she knows if she whines long enough she's going to get what she wants. So now to break her of the habit when you say no you're going to have to stick to it, so if you think you are going to cave and change your mind after 5, 10, 15 minutes don't even bother saying no to begin with because once you change your mind you reinforce the habit.

I agree with Anita 3 times is the most you should have to ask her to do something. My kids only have to be told twice, after I ask the second time if they aren't moving then I start counting. When I get to 3 I will have them sit in time out till they are ready to do it, which is usually under a minute because I don't use time outs often.

As far as asking the questions over, and over, and over, and over again that's pretty typical 3 year old behavior. I try to tune my daughter out after I've answered her one or two times, if that doesn't work I try to distract her with a craft or other activity. Sometimes I change my answer like if she asks where we're going 10 times, on the 11th I'll say we're going to the moon.

Anita - posted on 04/01/2013

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Tantrums are just faking crying you need to know the difference which I am sure you do. If she is not appreciative of what you buy her then tell her she gets nothing. Or maybe you can have her pick it ? Do not tell her more then three times to do something tell her once if she doesn't do it tell her again the second and tell her you will go to your room/ time out if I have to tell you one more time. After that tell her the last time and then put her in her room or time. This is going to show her that one you are the boss and two she needs to listen and when she doesn't she will have consequences for her actions. I really hope this helps you out.

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