3yr waking EVERY night and climbing into my bed...any help?

Kim - posted on 05/07/2010 ( 5 moms have responded )




I put my 3 yr old to bed at 8pm. She does not fall asleep until almost 11pm(asks for water, bathroom,hot cold...unicorns:), whatever)then once asleep, she wakes up at about 3a.m. every night and climbs into bed with me. Most times, I just find her there in the morning(very sneaky), if I wake up and take her back to her bed, she makes a big fuss, waking the other kids. She does take a nap at daycare.. Anyone have any experience with this issue?


Danielle - posted on 05/15/2010




I just went through this and resolved it and it was so easy!!! My 3 yr old was in my bed every night and driving me crazy!! I tried everything, even crying it out (which i'm totally against, but i was at my wits end). I would gate him in his room and he'd scream and cry and rattle it for hours.... so then I decided to make a sleep chart. I marked a calender by month and week and told him every night he slept in his bed without coming to mommy's bed he would get a sticker for his chart and a treat. I told him every night he stayed in his bed without waking up (or disturbing us) he would get two stickers and a treat. It has been 23 nights from day one with out rattling, crying, or screaming! 19 of those nights have been from night to morning without waking once. He did great! Kids love treats and pleasing you. I gave him bubbles, candy, marshmellows, crayons, cars for treats. I also promise him the park or a cafe where we go once in a while and he feeds the goldfish there. little things that he likes to do. The trick is to promise him a treat if he sleeps all night in his bed and mention it around dinnertime and then a few times after that until bedtime. Don't tell him what the treat will be until he wakes in the morning. I bet if you do this method you'll get a quiet night right from the start. Good luck!


the other moms ideas were good, but you can't reason with a toddler. They just don't get that and you'll be banging your head on the wall all night. trust me i've tried it all.


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Mandy - posted on 05/15/2010




I can totally relate to that. My oldest daughter was like that. I had so many family members that were not supportive. But I didn't mind it too much because it was the only time I ever got to cuddle with her. She handles the idea of consequences really well so I told her that if she got out of bed, then she owed me a time out in the morning. that really worked well actually. I also switched her to the upstairs bedroom near my room. Between the consequence and her being near us has been enough for her to stay in her own bed now.
Good luck!

Laura - posted on 05/15/2010




Is she in the same room as you? If not i would suggest a gate (possibly a dog gate if she can open normal ones!) this way she will not be able to get into your room/bed. Be strong and consistant. Stick to a very strict bed-time routine. Insist she has a small drink and a toilet trip before bed. You will no for sure she doesn't need any thing then put her to bed. When she makes a fuss and or gets out of bed the first time very calmly explain 'it is bed time now off to sleep', second time ' bed time', third time on wards say nothing. Keep putting her back in her bed. If she is loud stick with it. most other kids will sleep through a lot of noise but even if they do wake just say ' sorry but your sister must learn to sleep in her own bed. try to ignore her' This process will prob result in a few restless nights for all but if you stick to it you will crack it. Have a monitor in the bedroom so you will hear when she gets up in the night. Take a potty into her room and sit her on it the put her back to bed same routine as bed time. It's tough but it's worth it!

Maria - posted on 05/15/2010




You need to explain to her that from now on, she is going to sleep in her own bed, and she is going to go to sleep when you put her to bed. If she gets up, you will not talk to her or respond to her requests, but just nicely pick her up and put her back in bed and leave the room. You may have to listen to a bunch of screaming, and to put her back in her bed several times during the night. You and your family will be very tired for a few days, but if you are 100% consistent with this, she'll quickly get the picture. It helps if you can rotate nights with other adults in the household.

Stephanie - posted on 05/07/2010




not as bad as that. but a bit.
i just send her back to bed. I don't tuck her in again after the first time. no water, no additional stories, no unicorns. yes to one bathroom visit. :)
when she wakes in the middle of the night, she usually wakes me up. most of the time I let her crawl in with me for like 5 minutes to snuggle. but then I always send her back to bed. and she goes.

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