Four year old son scared of everything. How can I help him?

E - posted on 03/12/2013 ( 1 mom has responded )

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My precious four year old only child son is scared of so many things lately that it's driving me crazy. He is REALLY scared of dog, Chuckee cheese and now bugs! He wanted to go inside earlier today bc of all the mosquito hawks.

Anyway, I hate to see him in such distress especially over dogs, as this is the most severe and troubling fear he has. He literally jumps in my arms screaming and crying to get away from them. It may sound silly, but dogs are everywhere and everyone we know owns one. It interferes with a lot as we can't even go to some people's houses anymore.

He is otherwise a very sweet, loving and happy little boy. He loves all his friends, is very social and smart. It almost seems like a maturity issue with him.

Anyway, can anyone relate? I feel so alone. I need some advice on how to handle his fears and help him.

Thank you!

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Therese - posted on 03/12/2013

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Of course, I can relate. Don't worry too much about that, he will get better with age. I practiced attachment parenting when my little guy was young, so I was one of those parents with endless patience. (LOL).
Okay, so when my son was young, he hated dogs, he hated rooms with LED lights and so many other "stupid, little things".
I just comforted him and figured that when I can sit with him we can talk about his phobias, I really wanted to help him and to understand.
So, when he was about 8 years old, I sat with him and finally asked him why he didn't like (never used the word scared- I gave him a way out when I used that word) - so, here are some of the stuff that stuck in my mind.
- dogs (he didn't like their barking and they were so big) - now he wants a dog (liked it better when he was scared of them, my house is not child or dog friendly)
- lights (he said that the humming bugged him, it drove him crazy.... I didn't know what he meant, so one day, when my house was empty and I was alone, I turned off all the lights and sat in the dark for 10 minutes (my ears adjusted) - then I started turning the lights on, and sure enough a "hum" started, that was really making me irritated.
-needles (its not the pain, its the thought of something pricking his skin)
- pills (the fear of choking)
-oh yellow lights (he said his eyes would hurt - we later got him glasses and that Phobia is gone)
Anyway, right now you child is too young to explain anything. Really I wouldn't make him "face his fear" nor should you just belittle that fear, give him time and eventually he can explain everything to you.

Patience, patience and more patience and it all works out.
Good Luck

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