help

Nancy - posted on 05/10/2013 ( 2 moms have responded )

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Im a mother of two children, 5 and 3. i am 43 yrs and started over with a guy that said he wanted to have children. then when it really came down to it. he didnt want the relationship. i feel so sad and even angry cause i have two oldr children, 19 and 20 and now im starting over on my own.:( i feel so frustrated and sad all the time. i cant seem to hide my feelings and at times dont even care to spend the time i should with my two little ones. most of the time i just want to walk away from it all. but deep down i know i couldnt. but its on my mind alot. i want to be a stay home mom like i had planned when we decided to have children. i am at home with them but not income but child support. i dont feel comfortable leting anyone watch them. i did get into another relationship before i truly got over the father of my children and even married him but im still not over my ex! my ex kept messing with my feelings while i was wirh this new guy and now that i seperated from the new guy my ex now wont have anything to do with me. my life seems so messed up. Still wish my ex and i where toghether but my ex is totally ignoring me.:( his family doesnt help and my family was never a support group for me emotionally. messed up i know any suggestions?

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Marilyn - posted on 05/10/2013

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You need to cut all ties with your ex. Forget him. I know, easier said then done, but it seems like you had an opportunity to move on with this new guy and your ex ruined it. It seems like your ex doesn't want you to move on or be happy. Show him you can! Show him you're stronger than him! I know depression can get you down hence why you don't want to spend time with your babies, but your basically giving your ex what he wants. What about what You Want?!
Stand up girl! You don't need selfish jerks like him in your life!
I had an ex like that, but I wiped those tears and said "Screw him!" and killed him with kindness!
I agree, I don't trust anyone either with my son.

From your message, it sounds like your still married to this new guy. Is the new guy willing to go back and work things out with you?
If so, then get over your ex and move on with him. Go to marriage counseling, work things out. You want someone who Wants to be with you and who will love you and take care of you and your kids.
Someone who is going to and wants to make you happy.

Not selfish jerks like your ex!

If your new guys doesn't want to work things out, then move on from him as well, and the next time you find someone, don't let your ex get to you. Don't talk to him. What goes on in your personal life is NONE of his business. Don't give him that satisfaction, knowing he can get to you.

I wish you best of luck.

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Nancy - posted on 05/11/2013

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Thank you Marilyn for your input. I will sure think about what you said.:) how long did it take you to get over your ex. its now going on 3 yrs for me:/

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