How to ease Separation Anxiety?

Alexa - posted on 05/15/2010 ( 3 moms have responded )




Is anyone dealing with or have dealt with separation anxiety? If so please give advice about how to ease separation anxiety. I have a 2 yr old toddler she will soon be 3 in Aug and no matter when and where i go she goes into this stage. I do not leave her with strangers only family members she has known her whole life. She will be all ready to go see them and spend time all smiles. I will tell her the day before she goes and remind her while we are in the car that that is where we are going and i will be leaving and that is fine with her as well- but as soon as we get there and i say "I am going bye-bye will be back soon-give me kisses" she freaks and clings onto my leg. Will lay out on floor and kick and scream. Nothing distracts her she screams really loud. I understand she is spoiled my doing but this is outrageous and wondering how long this phase lasts or what i need to do to cut it.


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Natasha - posted on 05/18/2010




My son just turned 2 this april and my mom has grandkids every other saturday when i first started to take him to her house he screamed and cried....sometimes i would just say forget it and take him home with me...but now ill sit over there a while and let him start playing then id sneak know bad but thats the only way i can do it....after he realize im gone hes fine its only when he see's me leave that he has a fit.

Kathleen - posted on 05/17/2010




one thing that i have heard is to take your time. have a couple days where you have someone over to help you deal with it. tell her that you are going to leave but you will be back, make sure the person there is willing to deal with a screaming child, give them some favorite toys, things to do, etc. walk out of the house and stay out for 5 minutes, giving the sitter time to start one of the activities before you leave. after 5 mins, go in and calm her down, play for awhile and tell her that you are going to leave again. then do 10 mins. keep doing this until you actually leave the house, go do something like see a movie. then reassure her that you will always come back. just because she is crying doesnt mean that she will not calm down after you leave. she may just be testing you, trying to make you feel guilty for leaving her. just reassure yourself that she will be fine (she may be picking up some anxiety from you also, if youre nervous, she will be too)

Stephanie - posted on 05/15/2010




Unfortunately there's not a whole lot that you can do..I used to work at a daycare/preschool center and we had a lot of kids that were like that. The best thing that you can do is tell her you love her, give her a kiss, and GO! Do not linger because it makes it worse. As soon as you're gone and she's reassured that you'll be back later, she'll eventually calm down. Don't worry, this is normal.

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