how to stop my 3.5 year old daughter from hitting other kids

Miriam - posted on 10/17/2012 ( 1 mom has responded )

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my daughter hits other kids and most of time it seems that it's for no reason. she goes to kindergarten and hits her classmates almost on daily basis. it's become a nightmare for me to be around any kid, in my daughters presence and I'm experiencing a very stressful time cause i'm too nervous about "what is she doing now in kindergarten".

I heard that timeout specially in front of other kids badly affect Self Esteem of the punished kid and a lot of psychologists are against it. I talked to her in calm voice, firmness millions ot times. now i'm practicing with her, self expression of anger, happines,.... that instead of hitting she learns to talk about what she thinks or feels. I have left the scene with her,.... I even have tried time outs for a while but it seems I can't get done with this stage! I'm really going crazy. can you help please?

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Michelle - posted on 10/17/2012

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First of all at the age of 3-5 timeouts in front of their peers is what is going to help with the problem it will not hurt their self esteem. Children need to know that their will be a consistent consequence to their actions if she hits at the playground make her go sit in a time out on a bench where she can see the other kids playing and don't let her get up or talk until her 3 minutes are up then get down on her level tell her hitting is not nice and that the other children are not going to want to be her friend if she continues to be mean then make her go over to the child she hit and say sorry. This is a process and it will take time but you must and I do mean must remain consistent with your consequence or it will backfire.

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