I can't understand some people! Have you ever had a problem with this?

Jenni - posted on 10/14/2010 ( 38 moms have responded )

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I have a 2 year old daughter who is pretty calm (compared to my nieces and nephews anyways). Anyways, we went out to Olive Garden tonight with my boyfriend's parents and they tried to seat a couple in the table next to us...the lady all nasty says, "I deal with kids her age all day, I want to be seated somewhere else, somewhere where I can have a peaceful dinner." WTF?? really? But, they were packed so there was no additional seating available. As my daughter is eating the lady says "I cannot believe how good that child is acting, there must be something wrong with her" GRR!! By that time, I was pretty furious, but my daughter isn't a dummy (she's pretty smart and talks and understands a lot for her age...even though she doesn't know how to stay out of other ppl's conversations.) She Chloe, with a big smile on her face turns around and says "Cuse me, Nothing's wrong with Poe, me just a good girl. Show some pect." I almost died right there. The woman just looked at me like I was in the wrong.
I seriously don't understand people, do people not understand that all children are different??? Has anyone else had a problem like this?

38 Comments

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Elisha - posted on 11/03/2010

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HAHA your daughter is great!! I have never had that experience exactly but when my son was about 9 months old we took him to the movie theatre with us, and boy oh boy if looks could kill!! lol and of course a few people made comments but I just ignored them. My son did not cry once through the whole movie!! After it let out I got many compliments on how good he was from the same people that had earlier made hateful remarks about his presence!!! I loved it!!! Dont let people like that bother you, u r doing a great job, so let people make an ass of themselves, and just laugh at their ignorance!!

Marsharay - posted on 11/01/2010

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some ppl are really rude an u have to kill them with kindess sometimes at the end she wuz the one looking dumb

Megan - posted on 10/31/2010

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people in generalcan be ignorant i congratulate you on biteing your tongue, i probably would have had to say something just to set her straight so next time mabe she will think before she opens her mouth.but it sounds like your little girl took care of that herself!thats a good thing! she knows how to speak up for herself already!!

Helen - posted on 10/30/2010

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all I have to say is - Good for Chloe!



oh - and well done you for raising a child with the self confidence to stand up for herself like that!

Shana - posted on 10/30/2010

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People are idiots. The worst experience I've ever had was my youngest of 4 boys was sick (turned out to be a double ear infection plus a chest infection) and we where at the doctors in the waiting room. Being sick he sat on my knee and cuddled in and a woman told me that I should probably have his development checked becuase 2yrs old dont ever sit that still or are ever that quiet. Joey is a very shy boy when his brothers arent around (hes happy to follow their lead when they are around) and we are at the doctors for crying out loud obviously hes not 100% !! But the funniest thing I have had happend I took all 4boys to a taping of a morning "news" show in our home-town. While we where there a lady was handing out free show-bags. She came up to my children clearly ignoring a lady tapping her and yelling "excuse me" in the rudest way possible. After please and thankyous from my boys the lady handing out the bags turned to this other woman and said "Take your hands off me, clearly I am ignoring you becuase unlike these children you have no manners and the bags are for children first as I explained to you earlier" I was thrilled and very proud that the kids where noticed for good reasons.
I guess its easy to assume that all kids are annoying lil brats and thats how you will see them all if that how you look at them!! Kepp ur chin up, sounds like your daughter is fanstatic and this woman needs to be taught manners AGAIN

Anne - posted on 10/29/2010

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That is a classic! Good on your daughter for sticking up for herself. Don't feel like you were in the wrong... you were dealing with a very rude lady and you should be very proud of your daughter for telling her off.

Jennifer - posted on 10/28/2010

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I laughed so hard at your little girl's response. My 2 year old is pretty advanced in language development too and would probably have said the same thing!!! LOL! I actually had a single gentleman at a family restaurant in a resort town tell me that we were the most obnoxious family he had ever seen (we have 5 kids: 11, 7, 3, 2, 1 and our friends were dining with us with 3 kids 8, 4, 3) The kids were just being kids...they weren't even misbehaving. He said we were disgraceful. As the entire restaurant looked on, I replied, "I'm sorry you feel that way." He left, I was embarassed, but waited until later to fume. Some people are just ignorant and you need to either ignore them or come up with a snappy come back to shut them up. You did great!

Hillary - posted on 10/28/2010

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That happened to me, too. My husband, I and the three kids (aged 6, 3, and 16 months) went to a diner that we often frequent. My kids are very rowdy but they are adorable, talkative and like the attention from the other customers. Most of the clientele is elderly. The majority of the customers usually smile at my kids and interact with them and tell me how cute and funny they are. But, the last time we went there, a couple was seated near us. They experienced my kids for about a minute and asked to be seated elsewhere and they seemed pretty irritated. I guess you can't please everyone!

Jane - posted on 10/28/2010

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Yep, i had a lady on a train do exactly the same thing, My daughter was 1 year old and and said lady got on the train, rolled her eyes, huffed and puffed and looked at us as if we were the bane of her life, sat down and promptly asked to be moved.Unfortunately(for her and us) there was no where else to go so she had to suck it up which she did with incredibly bad grace!. At the end of the 5 hour trip when my beautifully behaved daughter had made no fuss what so ever, she was forced to admit her attitude sucked and she even went so far as to apologise to us which i imagine took alot of balls to do. People love to tend to the negative and when they are wrong it is so satisfying!! They are controlled by cliches and really should just shut up and take the situations as they come, you can only hope that they learn!!

Casey - posted on 10/28/2010

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I actually work as a hostess at a resturant... I get a comment like that about once a week... I don't get how people can come out to a family resturant and request to not be sat around children. (I have had even worse requests-where I have actually walked away from the table stunned) Where I work, we are suppose to tell them that we are not allowed to discriminate against anyone for any reason... It makes me angry for you that she assumed that there was something wrong if she was being good. My daughter is three and is also well behaved-I hope that she would have the nerve to stick up for herself in the same situation... I think hearing what your daughter said would probably have made me laugh for the rest of the evening most likely angering this lady even more... It's the woman with the problem-not your daughter.

Christy - posted on 10/28/2010

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I had my (at the time) 1 yr old and 2 yr old screaming in stereo in line at the grocery store to check out. An old man in front of me looks at the kids, then tells me "MAN, I wish those kids would be QUIET!" I look back at him and say "ME TOO!!!" HAHA. Some people don't have a filter on their mouths. Next time just say politely, "I don't remember asking you any question." with a sweet smile.

Danielle - posted on 10/28/2010

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Your daughter sounds like a very bright little cookie! My oldest was well behaved and always very articulate with his words! He is now in the gifted program and on the math team at school : ) makes a mamma proud. I do have the same methods of parenting with my youngest although they are 7 yrs apart in age. My 2 yr old is a terror, God love him, but he is a terror. Also very articulate with his words, but stubborn as a mule and wild as a tiger. I seldom take him out anywhere but the park and the pool. Discipline seems not to be affective no matter what I use and some days I just choose not to fight the battle and enjoy his wild nature.



Just remember all people are different (especially children), you didn't create their bad attitude or mood (they did when they woke up and decided to be grouchy), and ignore attitudes of others even when it seems they have a reason to be mad.

[deleted account]

its not always the parent allowing the tantrums sometimes its something else that causes the tantrums like my son he shows out everytime i go in public not because hes a misbehaved child but because he has spd and certain sound and alot of ppl set him off and no i dont allow it but sometimes it just cant be helped but for the most part i try to do my stuff while hes in school but were working on this stuff

Julia - posted on 10/28/2010

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YES!!! hahahaha was in a similar situation myself, we'd taken our 3 boys out then ages 2,7 and 8 out for a meal. We had people seated near us that were clearly there for a business meeting and really didn't want to be near us at all. My issue was that it was early dinner time, we always go earlier just in case lol. My eldest wasn't feeling very well so in the end we decided to leave early but just as we were preparing to leave the lady approached form the nearby table and actually complimented me on how well behaved they were. Now although it was nice to have it acknowledged why is it so difficult to for people to understand that children can be well behaved in a public environment? We shouldn't have to endure dirty looks or snide comments just because we choose to be proud of our children and take them 'out' in public, its ridiculous!!!!

Diane - posted on 10/27/2010

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That is the cutest thing. I hope that lady choked on her dinner after that remark! Good for your daughter being able to stand up for herself even at the age of two. Way to go Mom :)

Carisa - posted on 10/27/2010

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That's the funniest thing I've heard in a long time. I would have been very proud if my daughter had stood up for herself like that. I think the problem isn't the kids who know how to behave in public, but the parents who let there kids misbehave (I don't mean the ones who are just having a bad day). I always just try to make sure my kids aren't bothering anyone (and I am probably more sensitive about it than the people around me)

Grace - posted on 10/27/2010

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People are idiots. That is the only explanation. I hate it when people decide that because you have a kid you are not suppose to come out of your house. It makes the other person look bad when they look at the parents like something is wrong with them. I hate when I see a parent having a hard time in public because their child is sleepy or just fusing for no reason at all and other people look at them like they are doing something wrong. Makes me sooo angry. Like that parent isn't having a hard enough day already and you have the nerve to look at them any type of way. I've even had my friends make comments about how they hate when people fly with their kids. It makes me pretty upset too but I just keep thinking to myself, oh, just wait until you have kids. Keep in mind that this is also people that claim they want kids. People are too quick to judge. That's the bottom line.

Sarah - posted on 10/27/2010

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Oh I would be so heated if that happened to my family when we'd go out! My son is usually really great when we go out, as long as we go out when he's already fairly full and rested. Some people are just so rude, and that is SO cute that your daughter stood up for herself like that! Congrats to her, I hope that woman felt terrible for her response. Thankfully I've never encountered that situation, but I do understand that awkward feeling of people staring at you and assuming the worst in your kids.

Andrea - posted on 10/27/2010

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It looks like your daughter took care of that lady for you. I would have told her that there is nothing wrong with your daughter, and that maybe its how she handles herself around children (and apparently adults.)

Jessica - posted on 10/26/2010

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I've had people roll their eyes at me because my my son (who will be 3 next week) is VERY active and (as much as we try to keep him calm) screeches like a pre-teen who just won front row Hannah Montana tickets. He's used to running around like a little boy, and people think that he must be older based on his height (he's in the 90th percentile for his age) so he should behave better.
I do agree, that it's frustrating that someone old enough to know better would still behave in such a disrespectful manner. One of my mother's friends acts as if it's MY fault that my son is so full of energy, that he just gets up and takes off before I've had a chance to strap him down. It takes all my energy just to stop myself from punching her in the face! Just like you were blessed with your daughter, I was blessed with mine. Not everyone is blessed to enjoy parenting their children as you and I enjoy parenting ours! ;)

Erin - posted on 10/26/2010

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My husband and I have taken our boys out in public since they were days old. We expect a certain level of behavior from them (3yo and 18mo) and enforce it. We have taken them (our eldest mostly right now) into a bathroom where we have a stern talking about behavior. Either one of us can ask either of the boys when bad behavior is rearing its head if they want to go into the bathroom and have a talk and the bad behavior usually disappears. That said, the day before Mother's Day this year, we wanted to go out to eat. We decided to try Red Lobster first. As we walked in, my husband heard a couple say, "Good thing we're leaving since babies are coming." I got a dirty look from a couple that had their 9yo-ish son sitting next to them. The look basically said, "Get those bratty babies out of here." Since there was a 30 minute wait, we went elsewhere, but it really upsets me that people act like children should never be in public. How else are they to learn if the situation is never there? Way to go for your daughter telling that woman how it is. Children don't have to have "something wrong" to behave themselves in public. In fact, I'd say that means the parents have been doing something RIGHT.

Jessica - posted on 10/26/2010

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I recently got into a facebook rant with my brother, who of course has no children of his own, because he posted a link to an article about restaurants with a no kids policy. I of course replied to him that if it is a bar or an expensive restaurant I can agree that you would reasonably expect that you would not encounter a young child there however, he feels restaurants as a whole are not appropriate for children. I am tired of the looks & stares when I take my child places where those who dont want to be "bothered" by children are anoyed. It is called PUBLIC for a reason. You do not get to choose who you encounter when you go out in public. Bad behavior, whether it comes from a 2 yr old, or a 20 yr old is all the same. I cant stand being seated next to people who do nothing but cuss, talk loudly, or disucss what I feel are inapproriate topics but sometimes that happens. I dont tell them how they should behave. I just assess the situation & either move, leave, or deal with it.

Candace - posted on 10/25/2010

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wow.... just wow.... but you are right, children are not all the same, just like mothers and fathers, we all have our own parenting skills, even if our own parents showed us what might work with our babys it might not work, alot of people need to get out of that habit thinking all children are loud and noisy and messy, some of it isnt because of the parents either it could be because the child likes/wants to express the emotion they are feeling at the moment and cant contain themselves like we do. Same goes for all teens they are not all the same, in duncan(vancouver area) there is a burger king that discriminates against all teens because of a group of bad teens that went there, it isnt right discriminating people just because of the actions of some others mistakes, but im babbling now lol but yeah people should just let kids be kids if their out with their family cause who knows how long they get to see some of their family and it is good to have quality time with family, even the ones down the block from you or the next town over or so on

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Good for Chloe!
I think the saddest part of the story though is that she "deals with kids her age all day". Can you imagine how she treats them if she was willing to treat you and your daughter this way in public. No wonder kids act up around her. Kids that age are not stupid and do understand what you say. She probably shows them no "pect" and gets what she deserves.

Jade - posted on 10/19/2010

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ive had that before but thats fine if there not children fans then thats fine i am i like my own lol good on your girl good she can stick up for herself !

Robin - posted on 10/17/2010

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Wow! Sorry that happened to you and Chloe. I was at a restaurant not to long ago and was reciting ABC's with my 2 year old when a couple next to us asked to be moved. The lady of the couple kept giving us looks even after they moved. At first, I got hurt in response, especially because my 2 year old and I were having so much fun with the ABC's. Then I decided that I was not going to let this experience ruin our time together. As it so happens, I began noticing that many of the wait staff were really enjoying Ryan reciting ABC's and often engaged with him. I think when people get stuck in their negative outlook, they really lose an opportunity to enjoy the fun and delight that children bring into situations. That is really to bad...that lady could have enjoyed this experience as much as the wait staff did but she chose to place something like this in a negative light. That is a shame. Chloe sounds like a lovely child and I think that anyone who experiences her intellegence and forthright expression is lucky to do so.

Lisa - posted on 10/17/2010

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I love it! My daughter is also a good little eater when dining out and doesn't bother anyone except to smile at them and offer them her fry...lol! I chalk it up to her having two laid back parents who know when its a good time to take a child out in public. I would have looked at her and told her that there is nothing wrong with your child and maybe your just good parents! :)

Bridget - posted on 10/17/2010

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Never had that experience & it's a good thing I haven't. I am very assertive, and I would've let her know how rude she was. That was very nice that your daughter took up for herself. Sounds like she has better manners & is more grown up than the woman.

Krista - posted on 10/17/2010

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"Show some pect." That is frigging AWESOME. Go Chloe!!!

Besides, it's the frigging Olive Garden. You go out to a family restaurant, you've got to expect that you might wind up seated near a kid. You don't want to deal with a kid, go to a restaurant that isn't family-friendly. Easy solution.

Candy - posted on 10/17/2010

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I honestly don't understand how people can act that way. I'm the oldest of 5 children and now have 2 of my own but before I had any kids I've lost count of the number of times I've gone somewhere and been confronted with a screaming child, the parents going red with embaressment and trying to sshhh the child quietly so as not to make a scene. The easiest way to deal with that kind of a situation for all concerned is to just smile at the kid/s and mother/father. On a number of occasions I've had a little chatter with a strangers child and taken their mind off of the tantrum they were throwing and with amazing results. the mistake i think most people make is telling their child off the second they start getting 'cranky'. its much easier and more pleasant for everyone if you just distract them. Your child sounds like she has a good head on her shoulders and for someone who apparently 'works with kids all day' quite frankly I'd be worried if she worked with mine

Jessica - posted on 10/15/2010

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This reminds me of when my family was on an airplane a few years ago. My son was 3 or 4 at the time and he is a very good flyer - but I could tell that the people around us weren't thrilled when they saw us get on with our kid. But at the end of the flight we had many compliments on how well he behaved.
I think people are used to seeing children misbehave in public because the parents let that happen. I know when I'm out I see more kids misbehaving than not.
You just have to raise your child the best you can and be proud when she acts like a big girl. Try to ignore people - this woman you speak of sounds like one of those "kid experts" and didn't like being wrong about how a kid behaves!!
I do daycare and am around kids all day long and I don't have any problem sitting next to a family with young kids at dinner. I also have young kids and have gotten "that look" when we sit down sometimes!
Sounds like you have done a very nice job raising your daughter and she knows how to act in public. Her teachers will thank you for that in a few years!

Kathryn - posted on 10/15/2010

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I fly with my son, 26 months, a lot. He has been on over 60 planes now. Because he has flown so much, he knows the routine and how to act while on there. I get people ALL the time asking to be moved, even BEFORE the plane is moving just because they assume that because he is so you he will be acting up the whole time. Most of the time it bites them in the butt because where they move they actually have a toddler whom is acting up and screaming.



After the flights usually people compliment me on how good he was and compare him to other children on the flight. Unfortunatly, I don't really like that. Most poeple just don't give children a chance or care to understand that they are all different.



Basically what I have learned from all of it is, don't let it bother you. Some people are just rude, it is the "ego" in them. Though it is not right to judge people some adults judge children just based on the fact they are children. Think of it this way, you will probablly never see this person EVER again and what she said to you is no longer on her mind. So just let it pass, there will be other people that do the same thing.

Amanda - posted on 10/15/2010

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Never had that problem but all credit goes to your little one, good on her. You've gotta love kids for telling it like it is.
I hope the woman is more careful of what she says in public in future, especially in the vicinity of a 2 yr old.

Trista - posted on 10/15/2010

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Never had an experience like that but props to your daughter for sticking up for herself! I'm very impressed.
Basically you unfortunately had to deal with a very rude woman with no sense of personal boundaries or inappropriate behaviour.
Your very clever 2 year old summed it up, she should have showed some "pect"!

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