Is it normal for 4 and 5 year olds to cry and wine about everything?

Kishawnna - posted on 12/30/2010 ( 6 moms have responded )




Zakiah my 4 year daughter wines and cry about everything! If I tell her she cant have something she bust out in a cry! Or if she asks me for something and I dnt get it right away she wines and repeat over and over again. Is that a phase she goin through,or do she need some attention? What should I do?


Tracy - posted on 03/26/2011




I have a three year old who does the same thing, he crys and wines over everything. I had a talk to him about being a big boy and big boys do not wine and cry all the time. So when he does start to whine or cry I remind him of our talk and how he told me he would not wine or cry anymore, most of the time it works. I also will not get him what he wants if he wines I tell him if he wants it then he needs to ask in a big boy voice or he does not get it.

Elizabeth - posted on 03/23/2011




To answer your question..I don't believe this a "normal" phase for a 4 yr old. It is learned behaviour and then when it works they continue using it. To combat it, what you can do is say something like " I cannot understand you when you speak that way. When you can speak nicely come back and tell me"
You need to change this bad habit she has gotten into and it may take a while for her to not automatically revert to her whine.

Jennifer - posted on 12/31/2010




I think its a normal phase. My 6 year old still does this from time to time. Try not to give in when they are in their whining mode. Simply explain that this isn't the way we get things that we want. When my 6 year old asks correctly I say "Thank you! I love it when you ask like a big girl and are patient". She still needs to be reminded from time to time how to act and be patient like a big girl but I do see a difference from before.

Alexis - posted on 03/26/2011




im not there yet but if my son whines or cries for something I don't give it to him. I tell him he needs to ask nicely and usually he stops the whine and askes nicely. If it gets severe, as in throwing a fit, he goes into time out. When time is up I tell him we don't whine\cry to get what we want, we have to ask nicely. He then asks nicely and I then give him what he wants. It can be hard but don't give in or give too much attention to the whining or they learn they can get what they want with it.


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Yolanda - posted on 03/22/2011




I'm going through that with my 5 yr old. It started when he was 4 yrs old. He does the same exact thing your daughter does and it drives me nuts! I dont know what to do either. HELP!!!!

Kristen - posted on 12/30/2010




My 4 year old has started to do the same thing. Well he doesn't cry but he whines... constantly and it drives me crazy! So i am guessing that this is a normal phase. When my son whines for something like "moooom give me wateeeeerrr" (in his best whining voice), my husband or myself just say "you do not need to whine, just say mom can I please have some water?" and then he will usually repeat it in a calm voice. Thats all I got haha, hopefully this won't last long!

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