Is it rude to ask guests to not bring specific gifts to my daughter's birthday party?

Nicole - posted on 06/20/2012 ( 12 moms have responded )




I am in the midst of planning my LO 2nd birthday party and was wondering if it's completely rude to request specific items not be bought if bringing a gift. Here's why; my LO birthday is July 30th and many people are tempted to buy her summer clothes. In my opinion it is a complete waste of money at that point (she only will have about a month, MAYBE, to wear them) and many people do not give gift receipts. Is it rude to request no summer clothes on the invite?


Jen - posted on 09/05/2012




I think a great idea is to include a list of needed/wanted items in the invite - just a little insert like "DD's Wishlist" and include things you need or want, don't include things you don't need or want of course. Then that would likely pare down the number of people buying unwanted items, and it doesn't sound negative but instead sounds like a positive request!

There is just a much different tone that way - "Items she would like/need" vs "Do not bring..." Think of it like reinforcing kids, they say you get better results if you tell them to play this way instead of DONT play that way. It's positive vs negative. The guests would probably take it best that way! :) Good luck, and I completely understand, we have August twins :)

Determined - posted on 06/23/2012




I personally do not think it's rude. There are some things we don't let our LO have like like tank tops/dresses that tie around they neck/ low back, barbies because well the accessories are choking hazards for her little brother and IMO barbies these days are just too sexualized so we asked that no one bought barbies also this year for her bday we asked for no baby dolls her bday is in April and this past Xmas she got 4 babies from family so she really didn't need another. It's family they should know you're not trying to be rude.

Amy - posted on 06/20/2012




Yes I would say its rude but if asked what you want/need you could reply with "she has more then enough summer clothes but we could use some new fall clothes".


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Chet - posted on 02/07/2014




Yes, it's rude to put it on the invite. If you are chatting with people about the party and the topic of gifts comes up it's fine to mention. A lot of people will ask you for ideas before they go shopping.

Besides, a lot of summer clothes fit for two years since they aren't nearly as height sensitive as winter clothing that has long arms and legs. If you look at a size 3 sun dress, tank top, or pair of capri pants compared with a size 2 they're virtually identical. All of our size 2, 3 and 4 shorts look the same. Some size 2s are bigger than some size 4s.

Sherelle - posted on 09/05/2012




It not rude cause I asked ppl not to bring stuff I dnt approve of if they couldnt respect that thet could uinvite their self cause I am nit scared to give it back and say thinks but I dnt approve of it.

Anna - posted on 09/04/2012




you can create a wish list at toys r us. it is the same as a baby registry. They give you a card to include with each invitation. Also, yo can add a note at the top of the registry ssaying something like "Juliet will be in size 24months for the fall and winter,,,she's growing fast!" or you can have that statement printed out on the invites and avoid the wish list =)

Julie - posted on 07/03/2012




i would say it is rude to say no certain presents becasue this is making people feel like they have to bring one. you invite people to help you celebrate not for them to bring a present. presents are brought out of politeness and the want to do so and not becasue you have to so for you to say no certain presents makes them feel awkward and have to bring something. plus summer clothes can be adjusted for the colder times. you dont go straight from summer to wimter there is an inbetween weather too. a dress looks nice with a cardigan over the top and longer socks or tights on. the tshirts from a shorts set can be worn under a jumper or cardigan with nice leggins or trousers or jeans.

Katie - posted on 06/30/2012




I would not put it on the invite, but let them know when you talk to them...i.e. when they call to rsvp; then you can organically work it into the conversation!

Janice - posted on 06/21/2012




Yeah, it is rude to do in the invite, but I'm sure your close with the guests since your daughter is little and most people will ask. You can just mention it then.

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