my friends 18mth old not wanting to sleep anywhere but next to her any sugestions?

Bethany - posted on 06/15/2012 ( 8 moms have responded )

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hey all my girlfriend has an 18 mth old who is giving her grief with not sleeping in his bed all night...
he will sleep there for a while but then wakes screaming and wont settle until hes next to her in their bed no matter what! her and hubby have different shifts as hes up early morning to start around 5 and home earlier than her etc...
he has a good routine and will go to sleep for a few hours in his own bed but after that its down hill, biggest problem for her is he wont let her move even to get comfy, shes sleep deprived and tried most things ie cio pick up n put back down sleeping in his room, on the lounge etc any other suggestions that might help would be appreciated :)

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Terra - posted on 06/16/2012

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How about putting his bed in her room for a while or even just pushing the two beds together so everyone has more room. If he starts off in the room with her he won't have that wake up time in the middle of the night where he realizes she isn't there and then freaks out and doesn't want to let her go. He obviously misses her because she has to work and night time is the only time he has to reconnect for the day. He is still a baby and NEEDS his mommy. The more she fights it the more tired and sad they are both going to be.Regardless of what society has tried to program us to think there is absolutely nothing at all wrong with co-sleeping and just doing it out right can save both of their sanity. It's so hard when mama has to work and can't be home with the little one but in this day and age it's getting so hard for a mama to be able to stay home. That's why it's so important to spend what time she does have with her baby snuggling and playing and loving on him as much as she possible can. The house work can wait but her baby will only be tiny once and then it's just gone forever.

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Bethany - posted on 06/22/2012

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thanks girls, it would appear that he has been having some sort of growth cos in the last week and a bit all hes done is eat and sleep! lol. @terra their room is only just big enough for their bed not his as well, :( @ carol i dont think so he has been really good when in daycare and not cried like normal when she leaves, my son had a bad night and he slept thru so we are considering it could just be us!!! shes had 3 nights sleep and i have had 3 nights of no sleep lol! we both suggested that on opposite weeks we wake ours up so that theirs gets sleep but i dont think that will work lol.
she said thanks for the advice and shes hoping its a passing phase passing being the opritave word but she will just keep going and hope for cat naps during her days "off" :)

Carol - posted on 06/21/2012

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Sorry for the late reply. Is the child anxious about something? That is the only thing I can suggest.

Bethany - posted on 06/15/2012

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if she moves and he feels it he wakes screaming and wont be consoled for hours, she has tried the putting back to bed but he just screams until she cant handle it, she works tues thru thurs and i see it when she comes in shes so over tired and over stressed that shes ready to give up :( i gave her the tizzy hall save our sleep book and she has tried the tips in there to no avail, i was thinking if she could find one of those teddy bears with a heart beat or something that he could snuggle up to could help but i just dont know if it would.... but thanks for the info, hopefully he will snap out of it soon :)

Amy - posted on 06/15/2012

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What does he do if she tries to move? My daughter is 2 and starts out in her bed but ends up in ours every night, and so does my 6 year old. I'm so tired from working that most nights I wake up and they're just there, I don't have a clue when they get there. Co-sleeping works for us for the most part, if the kids are taking up too much space I just go to one of their beds and leave them with my husband. So I'm not any help at all, sorry.

Katherine - posted on 06/15/2012

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Oh wow, that sucks! He won't even let her MOVE? I would tell her to keep putting him back in bed. Just do it and do it over and over. They finally get sick of it trust me. Or tired. My daughters did the same thing to me. Only now I sleep with my 3 year old because I gave up....she got me and I was SO damn sleep deprived I couldn't take it anymore.

If I had the time and didn't work, the energy and patience I would absolutely try to do it.

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