Need advice on sibling rivalry

Kim - posted on 06/16/2010 ( 2 moms have responded )




I have 2 boys ages 11 months and 2 years 8 months. I am feeling a little stressed lately because they are starting to fight with each other more often. The older one will push on the little one because the baby is becoming more mobile and wants everything big brother has. I feel like I'm constantly consoling the baby and scolding my 2 year old. I'm guessing this will eventually work itself out as they both get a little bigger. However, it is driving me crazy at the moment. Anyone have any suggestions?


Donna - posted on 06/18/2010




The older may feel resentful of the younger sibling. Constantly scolding the older and consoling the younger is going to make things worse. I try to get my daughter involved in taking care of my son because she is Mommy's helper (they love this) and is a big girl. We also call my son "our baby." I will throw in things like, "Why is our baby crying?" "What do you think our baby wants?" "Where is our baby?" I also try playing with them both. I explain to her that we are a family and for me to play with her we need to include "our baby" and is there a toy that he can play with, with us? I also take time out for each child one on one -special time. I reassure my daughter that I love her, etc. Good luck. This is not an easy issue


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Crystal - posted on 06/30/2010




it's difficult when they are this close in age but what worked for me was staggering bedtime. my younger son goes to bed almost an hour earlier than my older child giving him time with me. i try to make sure that the tv and phone are off during 'his' time. now he likes to help me get baby ready for bed and play with him because he knows his special time is coming. also creating little things you do for just your older child (for now) may help, little surprises on his/her pillow or in his snack - things like that let mine know i still love him just as much as before baby came. if you don't address the rivalry if may never end, sometimes it's not just a phase. try to separate them a lil more if you can even though it may be difficult when they are close in age.

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