Needing advice, reformed disciplinary ..?..

Cait - posted on 04/28/2012 ( 2 moms have responded )

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I have used spanking for disiplin for a few serious actions my three an half year old has done..bit his little brother, almost threw the skin. anyways spankin, not for me. Now tryin to mend, what i feel is a damaged relationship with my son.? .. Help!

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Louise - posted on 04/29/2012

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Teaching a child disciplin is very difficult and it needs to be agreed by both parents so that the child knows that one parent is not softer than the other. I find exclusion is a big deterent. When my sons were small I would warn them that if they did not stop they would go to their rooms. Once warned if they continued off they went. This gave me time to calm down because I did used to smack my sons (we are talking 20 years ago). I found removing them helped me to relax and was able to deal with them easier. Then go into his room and get down to his level and ask him what he thinks he did wrong. Talk it through with him and then tell him how he should of behaved and end the chat with a hug.I suppose this is a version of the naughty step which also works well but if your child wont sit there it defeats the object.

I do use the naughty step now with my daughter as a last resort but I dont need to exclude her because she is the only child at home. Your sons will try your patience to the max when they hit about 7 as boys love to rough and tumble all the time and by separating them is the only way to get them to realise you have had enough!

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