Potty training troubles!

CJ - posted on 01/03/2012 ( 13 moms have responded )

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My daughter will be 3 in just over a month, and she's been successfully potty training since August. Lately though we've been having an issue I don't knopw what to do about. When we go out, she's great, tells me when she needs the potty and makes it without an accident even when I can't get her to one for up to ten minutes (we live in a smaller town outside a city, so if she tells me she has to pee on the way home from there it could be up to 10 minutes before she gets to go), but then at home she has numerous "accidents." I put that in qoutations because I call them accidents very loosely, as most of the time I'm quite sure she's fully aware of what she's doing. As she tends to have her accidents right after I have asked her if she needed the potty, I find it hard to call them accidents. Especially the poopy ones. A few days ago, we went to a friends house. I was sure we'd have an accident as she'd be very distracted playing with my friends son. But she didn't, we were there for 5 hours and she peed twice, telling me both times when she needed to go. But then when we got home she pooped in her panties even as I was asking her if she needed to poop (she was making a wierd face and doing a "dance" much like the pee pee dance), she insisted that she was niether pooping or needing to poop, even as she was doing it in her pants. Any advice would be much appreciated! As I don't know what to do about this problem. She backtracked in her potty training once already (I thought she was ready to train, and she did wonderfully for a month, then refused to use the potty for anything, so we gave it up and decided to try again when she showed an interest again, which happened almost 6 months later) But she's been doing really good, with barely an accident for around 4 months, and I really don't want to have to start over again. She doesn't all out refuse to use the potty like before, so I don't know what the problem is. Please help.

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Aimee-Grace - posted on 01/09/2012

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I used m&ms for peeing and dum dum lollipops for poops (and Ionly did this for the house). Once we were getting close to finishing, I would remiond her that once they were gone she would be a big girl who wouldn't need treats to go, just like Mommy and Daddy. Everytime I gave her one I would remiond her and in the end there was no problem with the transition.

Lise - posted on 01/09/2012

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Once the is going consistently for the m&m, you can go two ways:
1) fade the reinforcement (treat after she goes 2 times, 3 times, etc), or
2) change the treat so she gets it when she stays dry for a certain amount of time. Then you can increase the time.

I prefer option 2, since we are all reinforced by staying dry (although with different contingencies).

CJ - posted on 01/09/2012

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I actually did start giving her an m&m for peeing in the potty, I'm just worried that it's more about the treats than anything now. What's going to happen when I stop giving her the treat....how long should I keep rewarding her with treats?

Liz - posted on 01/09/2012

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Give her the attention maybe by giving her an m&m? Sounds like attention not really a physical problem because she isnt doing it outside the house! Changes are normal in everything with kids!!!

Aimee-Grace - posted on 01/06/2012

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I used www.3daypottytraining.com with my daughter. Don't ask her, remind her to tell you when she needs to go. Put all the responsibility on her. If she starts to go, rush her to th potty, remind her to tell you when she needs to go, and tell her you don't want her panities to get wet/dirty. Look at this website and hopefully it well help you. It tells you you can do it in 3-7 days, my daughter to the 7 days because she is stubborn and I had an infant so sticking like glue to her was harder to do. Good Luck!

Lise - posted on 01/05/2012

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If she's having frequent accidents, you may just want to have her stay there until she goes. Or, sit for 5 minutes, up for 3 minutes, then back to sitting on the toilet. I would be careful not to make it seem like she's sitting for punishment (not that you would), but just that you want to help her know when and where to go.

CJ - posted on 01/05/2012

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I usually set the timer for 3 minutes. If she hasn't gone by then I let her get up to try again later.

CJ - posted on 01/04/2012

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Lise, the only problem is that it's not even usually when she's doing anything fun, most of the time it will be right after I brought her to the bathrrom to go potty and she sits there for awhile without going, says she can't go. Then does it in her panties not even 5 minutes later.

Lise - posted on 01/04/2012

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It's very common for children to have accidents when they are doing something fun. Rather than ask her, I would say something like, "We need to pause the activity for a minute and go sit on the potty. We'll sit for 10 seconds (or 20, whatever) and then come right back to playing!" When she does go, cheer for her and say, "We'll go right back to playing. Don't forget we can always pause the game/toy/etc. while we use the bathroom."

Katherine - posted on 01/04/2012

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The best advice I can give is that when you see that cue that she is pooping, run her to the toilet.

Also it sounds like she's doing it for attention too.

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