Realistically, as a mother of two biys, ages 2, and 7, how much me time per day can I expect to have?

Chhavi - posted on 11/09/2012 ( 4 moms have responded )

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I am a stay at home mom to two biys. My husband works long hours. many times, I find myself craving a few hours or en entire day off,but rarely get it. my husband suggests that I go out with my toddler while my second grader is at school - go grocery shopping, to thelibrary etc. but many times, esp. now as it's getting cold, I find it is too much of an effort to put him in warm clothes, then the car seat, then get him into the stroller, and by the time we re halfway through with the 'outing' he gets cranky because he's either hungry, or sleepy. So, I prefer staying in with him on most days.

Am I being lazy or just practical?

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Arreyn - posted on 11/10/2012

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I know I feel the same way with my 11 month old-- by the time he's changed, fed, dressed, and we're out the door, I'm half-way to the next change/nap/whatever. I don't think you're being lazy, just practical. At the same time, though, I've found that when I do go through the effort, as tiring as it is, I usually feel better for having gone outside. I've noticed that the more days we stay inside, the more grumpy my toddler and I both get. Instead of trying to go somewhere in particular or achieve something specific, I've been trying just to go for walks every day. I still have to bundle my son up, but then I just stick him in the stroller and go. I try not to have any expectations for how long we'll be out, and just pack some snacks in case we walk really far. I've found that whenever we manage to get even a short walk in, I feel more energized and overall happier.

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Ronel - posted on 11/21/2012

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Practical! Its not 'me time' with a toddler, its worrying constantly about them, they get cranky and you get irritated, dont you know someone that can look after your son for the morning so that you can go for that well deserved massage? Or what about the indoor play centres? Most have a coffee shop so you can read your magazine or book or play games on your laptop and just relax while your son play?



Maybe you must consider putting him in a play group for 2-3 times a week halfday or for 2 hours. Just to give you time to rest and spend time with yourself.



Good luck! Hope you find your solution.

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I agree, I don't know why husband's think it's a vacation to be down 1 kid, it's still the same job. I find getting the kid in the car is too stressful, but what I like to do is bundle her up and take a walk. I get exercise which feels great, and she seems to enjoy the journey, plus we bring the dog. I have the good fortune of my youngests nap time coinciding with the oldest being at school so that helps with the me alone time. But sometimes too you just have to tell your husband you're going out and he's watching the kids, nicely of course. He might not always be thrilled, but he certainly appreciates me by the time I get home, ha ha. Good luck.

Chhavi - posted on 11/11/2012

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yes i know we can bundle up and go, and he doesnt really mind the cold as long as he's warmly dressed. and will keep in mind the 'feeling more energized and happier' part of it.

theres something about walking outside that instantly 'wakes you up' and gets you going.

thanks so much for the positive encouragement! :)

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