Recently Divorced, new to being a single mom, HELP!!!???/

[deleted account] ( 2 moms have responded )

I am new to the whole single mom aspect/avenue. I am doing everything 100% on my own, I have no job, and a huge support system from my family, but I am worried that the boundaries I had in place will no longer stick. I am living with my parents currently, I moved from out of state, back here. Any suggestions on how to keep my boundaries that I had in place before, now with my parents being in the picture 100% as well, how do I juggle both? Any help would be great!

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Brooke - posted on 04/12/2013

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I hate to say it my dear, but with big changes happening, your kid/s? are going to push those boundaries for a while. Stay consistent, I know it is easy to feel sorry for them, and get into the whole " well, I am the only parent, I don't want to be telling them off all the time" way of thinking, but it will make your life and theirs easier if they know to expect the same thing from you everyday, instead of, say, letting them sleep in your bed now and trying to change it in six months time for example. Are your parents the type to stick by your rules, or will they try to take over and put their own in place? If you can, have a talk to them and tell them what you want for your kids, ask them to abide by those rules, so your kids don't start playing you all against each other. Good luck, and remember to make some time for yourself, as a single parent it is even easier to 'lose yourself' in your children.

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[deleted account]

Brooke- Thank you so much. Yes I have one child, and my parents do listen to and respect what I have in place, but at the same token, this is the first grandchild, so often times those rules and boundaries are given the 'exception' rule, too much in my opinion. I appreciate your response. I agree with your example, thankfully my son has been sleeping in his own crib since he was about 6 weeks old. That I am grateful for. And time for me, I have been able to sneak in a few 'walmart' runs without the baby, as well as some close girlfriend time, I hope to keep that, and hope that it doesnt go away. Thanks again for the advice, I do need to sit down and talk more directly with my parents.

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