Starting to feel overwhelmed

Shawnteria - posted on 10/18/2014 ( 2 moms have responded )

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So my son is turning two in a week and its like he's a whole new child(if you know what i mean) well he's still my little helper and isn' t throwing outrageous tantrums but he is starting to not listen when he's told something i have to chase him to change his diaper sometimes he's startingto swing back if i pop him on the hand when telling him no and i know there are many people who do not agree with poping there child but i find it eeffective when he'strying to play with an outlet. But on top of all of that hes starting to try to act out in public and like ive said he never had these problems before but i am starting to feel stressed sometimes i have to stop and tell myself to breathe when hes disobeying me because i dont want to discipline him while im frustrated because thats not fair to him. How do i stop or prevent my child from becoming overly troublesome ? I know he's a child so hes going to be trouble sometimes but i know theres a way i can pass to him that theres a time and a place for everything?



I dont want to seem like im a horrible mom who does not have her son in control by my family or the public.....what to do????!!!!

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Ayesha - posted on 10/20/2014

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I found that both my girls went through 'phases' every 6 months or so. And right around then, they'd act up more. More whiny, more tantrums.
First off - it's a phase and it passes.
Second - in public, I would take them aside and speak to them in a stern voice and give them an ultimatum. If they continued to misbehave, they'd have consequences - no treats for the day or they wouldn't get to ride their scooter for the day. I then made sure to follow up on it because kids are quick in figuring out they can play you if don't follow through.
Hope that helps!

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Sarah - posted on 10/20/2014

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He is old enough to start doing time outs. You will find that these will become more effective then a pop on the hand. PS for the outlets they should have safety covers on them (those are impossible to get off even for adults sometimes). Kids are always going to test the boundaries and the testing changes as they get older and wiser. Setting boundaries and staying consistent is the best way.

For time outs find a spot where there are no toys or things that can become a toy, a place where he can't see tv and has no interaction with others. You give one warning for the behavior....make sure you are at their level and have eye contact when you give the warning in a stern voice. If the behavior continues then you take to the time out spot....again at their level you explain why he is there.....short and simple....you are in a time out because you hit. Then you set the timer for 2 mins. (1 min. per year of age) He needs to sit in that spot for 2 mins. If he gets up before 2 mins. then you take him back to the spot WITHOUT saying a word and reset the timer for 2 mins. At first you may have to take him back several times and it may take hours before he sits for 2 mins.....but if you stick with it and are consistent it does work and then next time out goes much better. While he is in time out you DO NOT talk to him.....NO MATTER WHAT HE SAYS!!! When the time out is done you then explain again...short and simple.....why he was in time out.

Time outs can be done anywhere at any time. If you are out in public a time out can be any spot that is in a corner or it can even be in the car. He will test the boundaries, so plan for one as some point to be in public. BUT.....once he knows that you will follow through it is amazing how fast just the warning will stop the behavior!!! I find that 2's are when they are learning this. By time they hit 3 yrs old I am rarely giving time outs and a warning is as far as I need to go.

To a child a time out from an activity or people is the worst.....a pop on the hand is a quick response that has little effect on them, so the consequence for misbehavior holds no weight. This is also why for a 10 yr old a time out means nothing.....the time out now holds no weight for a 10 yr old as they could care less if they are taken from an activity or people for a set amount of time. Tv time, computer time, for my middle child it was gum being taken away....were worth more to her then a time out.

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