Step Mom seeking advice on child support

[deleted account] ( 1 mom has responded )

Hello I am just seeking some advice on child support and what peoples opinions are on it. So here is the back story, I met the my boyfriend back in 2011 and we dated for about 6 months but I was not ready for a relationship so I broke things off with him, shortly after he slept with a girl and got her pregnant. When his son was a month old we started things up again and we both realized we were in love with each other. When his son was approx 3 months I met him and fell in love with him as well. We cared for the son approx ten days on avg give or take each month for the first 5 months of his sons life because she was not breastfeeding so it allowed us to spend multiple days with him. From day one he was paying 800 a month while she lived with her parents and went back to school so while the child was with her she had him in daycare and with us he stayed home with me because I worked night shifts. When his son was 6 months the mother asked for a set schedule so we had him from wed-sun 6-6. We decided it was not enough time so we asked for tues-sun 6-6. Now while all this was going on the mother had one boyfriend that she apparently broke up with but did not tell my boyfriend and then a month later was moving in with another one and his entire family (lived at moms still) a cross the city which we later found out that the reason for this is that she was pregnant with his child. They then said they had taken him out of daycare and my boyfriends decided to start paying 500 a month also because we had him almost 40% of the time. The mom and new boyfriend has since gotten a small apt together and have had the baby. It has been a uphill battle for us to push for equal custody and she has refused to talk about it because in her opinion the child is too young but with these circumstances I know its not the case. My boyfriend has a incredible close bond with his child and so do I. He has never cried during exchanges and is so happy when with us. My boyfriend finally convinced her to sit down and talk about everything and she agreed that by his second birthday that he could have equal custody which was a huge relief because the last thing we would want is too make messier and take her to court. It was a tough up hill battle especially since she took everything very personally (which I understand why she did) which made communication extremely difficult, but since she had her second baby she has been very easy to deal with. Now my question is and what I am wondering is are we obligated to still pay her child support when it comes to 50/50? We do make a lot more money then her and her boyfriend and now that she has a second baby it will be awhile before she can finish school or work and we are more then willing to pay for my boyfriends sons clothing/ bluecross(plusmeds)/extra curricular activities ect but we don't feel like we should have to pay her a monthly set sum for them to support him on there time. Just curious what other peoples opinions are on this since I feel my opinion is biased obviously.


Michelle - posted on 10/21/2013




Here in Australia when you have shared care the child support is worked as if you are paying each other (based on each income). The parent who earns more has to pay the other but of course it's not as much as if the other parent had full custody.

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