Toddler attachment issues! Tips to stop the crying, please!

Heather - posted on 04/21/2012 ( 3 moms have responded )

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My toddler has attachment issues! She has ALWAYS been extra attached to me from very early on. She constantly wants me to pick her up/hold her. I can't leave a room, go the the bathroom, cook, wash clothes, eat meals, or sit down sometimes without her breaking into hysterics! I know part of this is normal, but this is more than just a "phase she'll grow out of". This has been at least 14 months or more without a break in this so-called "phase"! I analyze behavior for a living, but this is beyond me:-/ Anyone else out there dealing with this and do you have any tips?

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Jeorge - posted on 04/26/2012

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Louise is right.
If she wants to be with you when you are cooking or washing clothes have her help. Kids can mix things and help you make sure you have all the ingredients. When you are putting the laundry in the dryer hand some to her to put in. Give her a chance to be with you without being in the way. Take it as an opportunity to teach her.
Don't forget it's ok to let her cry

Louise - posted on 04/21/2012

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I think you need to train her to know that mummy is coming back. What you do is ask grandma or somebody she knows well to come over and then you get down to her level and say mummy is going out for 10 minutes see you later and then leave. Do not turn around or react to any tears. Leave the room for 10 minutes let her cry. She will not cry for the whole 10 minutes. Then come back say hellow but dont make a fuss. Half an hour later do it again and again until she does not react at all. This may take several goes but worth it.

Do not pick her up all the time, steer her attention to toys or something else. If she wants to be picked up make her wait. Just say "In a minute" and make her wait.

She will wean herself off eventually. If you do not already attend a mums and tots group then find one in your area. She will gain confidence by watching other children her own age and venture out to parallel play.

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