Toddler Tantrums

Jess - posted on 11/05/2010 ( 2 moms have responded )

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I have a 17 month old son.
For the past few weeks, everytime i take him out of the house he will cry and scream and yell non stop the whole time no matter where we are. Ive tried buying him things, taking his favorite toys, and its gotten to the point where I YELLED at him, and that is NOT me. I am as cool as a cumcumber when it comes to my son. He headbutts everything (the ground, other people etc) and can really do himself damage. Hes started this real newborn-like cry and added a shocking high pitched squealing which is terrible when your in a resturantn with 30 other people around!! Hes honestly driving me crazy. Just to get 5 mins peace to sit down and write this, Ive put him in his bedroom and hes STILL screaming blue murder! My head has been throbbing for days and he just wont stop. He layed on the floor of the supermarket yesterday and threw a huge tantie! People look at me like 'oh you poor thing' or when I ignore the tantrum they seem to look more like 'you horrible woman'. I really dont know what to do... today hes refused to eat because hes too busy crying. I know there isnt something terribly wrong because at times he will suddenly stop to tell me something or look at something he likes. We even get a few laughs between tantrums!! im pulling my hair out here ladies, please help!

2 Comments

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Kristen - posted on 11/06/2010

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I'm right there with ya!! My son is 16 months old! It has gotten so bad that my FH has googled reasons of a fussy baby.
They all say the same thing, distract him. If its his teeth, let him chew on cold bagels, or frozen bananas. If something hurts, give him a shot of baby aspirin or tylenol and rub him down with baby lotion. He may want something and he is frustrated that he can't communicate what he wants. I offer my son a variety of things when he gets like that. A sippy cup of juice, a bottle of milk, a cookie, a graham cracker, some of his favorite things until I can get him calm.
With me it got to the point where I would not take him anywhere by myself. I would wait until FH could go with me, or see if FH would sit with him while I leave. ( I couldn't even go pee with out hearing... *knock knock.."mum" knock "mum"*) he is getting better but it is not fun while it is going on, but it gets better...
I put my son in "time out". I would put him in his crib and tell him that as soon as he is done throwing his fit I will come get him. He would normally cry for 2 or 3 minutes. Then he would look at me and realize that I wasn't picking him up. He would stop crying. I would leave the room, leave his door open, then get him in 1 minute. He would go for awhile without any more "BF's"
Hope it gets better soon for ya!

Heather - posted on 11/06/2010

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Oh my how frustrating., Are you really sure there is not something wrong? Teeth coming in? HE is sick? Something hurts? He had vaccines lately and had a reaction? Someone scared him? Something scared him? I would start by really making sure he is OK, just becasue he can be distracted does not mean that he is def ok. Next i would look into seeing if he is frustrated becasue he cannot communicate well, if this is the case work on teaching him some signs so that he can tell you what he needs and what he wants before he escalates. Next i would look at his sleep, is he getting enough? Is his sleep quality sleep? do you need to adjust nap time? Do you need to adjust bed time? Then i would think about is there something that has changed that is upsetting him (someone working more hours, more or less contact with somone important to him? ) is this is the case keep talking to him about it in a calm supportive way. Or maybe it is just a phase and if that is the case i would work on some behaviour modification (really praising when you see him behaving well, talking to him about how good he feels in side when he is calm and behaving well, ignoring the bad as much as possible, trying to intercept and redirect before tantrums happen, taking away a fav toy for innaporiate behaviour, etc-yes i know he is only 17 months old and he may not get it at first but if you keep talking he will get it, if you stay consistant and loving he will understand). I have found that in general when kids change drastically there is something going on so try to be a detective and figure out what the trigger is so you can start at the source. Good luck and hang in there.

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