When Playdates go wrong.....

[deleted account] ( 2 moms have responded )

Ok, I pretty much know the answer to my question but I would love to hear what anyone thinks about my current Playdate Stalker.

In a nutshell, she's 4 yrs old going on super annoying, is bossy and the only one my child has been around due to new move and yes the most probable culprit for the theft of my daughters one and only lovey toy. She shows up at my door unannounced, at various times and seems to dictate when my daughter can come and go instead of asking. Which makes it hard for me to explain somedays to my 3 yr. old that this little girl's word is not law.
Her Mother makes no contact with me directly and only will speak to my daughter. There's more to the whole story but basically I don't like them, don't want to hurt my daughter nor do I want to be mean to this little girl as I am finding out why she is like this. But at what point do I draw the line and NOT involve my child in a situation i am not comfortable with, a child I do not like or trust and a parent that obviously wants nothing to do with me?
I have no problem doing things "my way" but that has tended to get me in trouble in the past (my mouth that is) and now with children I would love some advice on how to handle things "nicer".

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Christy - posted on 01/14/2011

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Talk to this child's mom ASAP and tell her why you won't allow your child to play with her. Also, why is a 4 y/o coming to your door w/o her mom? I would escort her back home once she shows up at your door and tell the mom why, that it is unacceptable to be unattended at your house. What if she got hurt at your house and the mom sued you? Just a thought.

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[deleted account]

I started to feel like I was overreacting and then my husband went and spoke to the management without me knowing and apparently there have been multiple complaints about this child being unattended and the fact she roams freely into other people's property. So when he used to think I may be obsessing about it, the fact that another person agreed with and had more to add to the situation sent it all home for him. Hey, I don't care how we get there sometimes I'm just glad we're on the same page and most of all glad my first instinct was correct.

I had to escort her home the first time she showed up and got nothing but a "thank you" and the door shut. And at that time I chose to "play nice" as my first response was not going to be so nice. But I'm glad I held out, and let someone else see what was going on and now hopefully the proper people will take care of it. As you said if she gets hurt it'll end up being someone else's fault and I don't want her hurt. It's not her fault she's probably just starving for attention.

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