WORK, SCHOOL AND TODDLER MAYHEM!

Maddie-May - posted on 08/25/2013 ( 5 moms have responded )

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Hey guys, I am a 22 year old mother to a energetic 3 year old toddler. My partner and I log an average of 70 hours of work between our two jobs per week and take full time care of our little man as he is still awaiting a spot at daycare (we live in a small town). Recently I decided to bite the bullet and apply for part-time study to become a registered nurse and eventually a midwife and to my utter suprise, I was accepted!!! Now that I am enrolled and due to start studying through distance ed, I am freaking out as to how I am going to handle my workload, study and little X, are there any mummies out there who are in similar situations or anyone who can offer a insight into what sort of routine I would have to put in place now that my situation has changed?

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I can tell you it's going to be hard, but hopefully, worth it. I am a first year law student and I have a four year old and a 2.5 year old and I work part time (thankfully, just part time) from home. Some nights/days, you'll feel on top of the world and love being in school and learning and having something just for you (that will eventually benefit all of you), but there will also be days you feel like you can't do anything right, and it will make your heart literally ache to tell your child you can't play because you have to study. And, there will be times (like I had tonight) when you seriously question whether it is worth doing it at all and if you should just decide to stay home, once and for all, and never look back.

But, as a previous poster said, it will all take time to adjust and for you all to find your groove. And, you will need more help from your spouse. Let him cook. Let him do bathtime and let him worry about switching the loads in the laundry when you need him to do those things. But, I think the thing to remember most, is there will be an ebb and a flow to it all. I try to leave Saturdays just for our family and be all in 100% of the day. On Sundays, after church, I study all day. I try to do that week's readings before the week starts and then review and do my outlines (a law school thing for outlining the key points of every case we read) either on Sunday or as the week goes on. Sometimes I'm a rockstar at it and sometimes outlines just don't happen. And, every once in a blue moon (as in, tonight), I realize I did the wrong reading for a class and that I screwed up the instructions on one assignment because I didn't read closely enough because I have two little ones who still wake up at night sometimes and who climb all over me during the day. In other words, you're not going to be perfect at it. You're likely going to have days where you feel like every other student is super prepared and you aren't. But, you also are a mommy and you are balancing that against everything else. And, while you may have to say no to play time sometimes, your little one is still your priority above all else, and that's okay. That's how it should be.

So, work hard, plan meticulously, forgive yourself if you can't always make it work, and give yourself a day every once in a while to just hang out in your PJs with your kid and enjoy life. (That's what I'm doing tomorrow, and I can't wait. I'm keeping my 4 year old home from preschool and we're all just going to spend the day together. I need it, and they need it.)

Brooke - posted on 08/29/2013

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First of all, don't expect everything to work out perfectly straight away. Give all of you some time to adjust. It is great that you have a hubby who is willing to share the workload. Plan meals that are quick and easy to make, but still healthy, even try cooking in bulk when you have time and just freezing stuff, that can make a huge difference when you are busy, if you don't have to worry about dinner. Plan your week around a routine, but just remember that kids can sometimes mess up the best routines in the blink of eye, so be prepared to let go if you need to. It sounds like you are taking on quite a lot, so that will make it doubly important that you schedule time for yourself to relax, otherwise you will end up on overload and won't enjoy any of it. Also, don't forget to make family time, as well as time for you and your partner. it is worth giving up those couple of hours at work just to reconnect with your loved ones!

Alicia - posted on 08/26/2013

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First thing I could think to tell you is that spending time with your child will as you know will be less then your use to but that you can still have quality time with your child you just have to set up a routine give your self time to adjust to it things will fall into place. If you know your schedule with work, school, etc. then it makes it easier but sometimes you don't always have set work hours so it might take some adjusting. it is great to have the opportunity to improve for your family and yourself. hope i helped.

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Elisabeth - posted on 01/07/2014

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Hi, I am new to this site. I am a single mother and am enrolled in school full time. I work sporadically but not consistently.I have a 2-year-old, very girlie (i.e. needy), daughter named Isabella. I think individuals will handle a situation uniquely as each situation has simple factors that create enough difference that what works for one will not always work for another.

I will tell you what has worked for me and hopefully there will be something helpful for your situation. I read while Bell-Bell sleeps. Whether that happens with a nap, before she wakes in the a.m., or after she drifts off to sleep for the night. Reading while she is awake does not work for me. I do the online discussion assignments while she eats breakfast or lunch (I rarely eat a meal before dinner) or is watching a show she likes and write papers whenever Kevin or Mindy (my best friend) is around to entertain DaBella. I am lucky in the sense that I learn easily and do not require a ton of study time. Once grad school starts I will have to rework the approach to school and figure out a study plan.

Good luck to you!

Marie - posted on 09/06/2013

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Happy Birthday Matti wishing you a great day . Nana and Papa loves very much .
Love Nana

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