15-month old acting out of jealousy?

Stacy - posted on 03/30/2010 ( 8 moms have responded )

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My husband recently got laid off of work so he's been home with my 15-month old son & myself. The past few days our son has just been a handful & a half. Not listening to either one of us, doing things he wouldn't normally do, & throwing a temper-tantrum. Is this normal, is he just pushing our buttons since Daddy is home all the time or what? I'm not sure how to really "discipline" because these actions are not okay, but he has never acted like this. I was maybe thinking because of the change of my husband being home all the time. But, I just am not sure what to do anymore. Does anyone have/had some similar problems, is there anything I can do before I start pulling out my hair, lol?

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Elizabeth - posted on 03/30/2010

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You nailed it...Your son is use to it just being you too, his mommy time. Have your husband do something with your son. JUST THEM. You take a day to yourself! It is a HUGE adjustment for our kids when they are use to seeing one parent more cause one is home and one is at work... My 2 yr old STILL DOES THIS

When her dad has a day off and she knows he shouldn't be home, so he has daddy daughter time for about half the day and she enjoys it. Yes, she still gets mad sometimes but it's okay she is 2.

Lea - posted on 03/30/2010

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Thats really strange. Are you the one working now? If so, I would agree that your son is upset because you are not home any more. If you and your husband are spending more time together yes, I would say it is definitely jealousy. These are my suggestions: it sounds like your son is extremely attached to you but after he turns 2, towards age 3, he should be starting to identify with his father, look up to him, wanting to be just like him. My 2 year old is starting to do this, wanting to sit in his daddy's lap, imitating him, etc. I think you can help this along by encouraging your husband to be involved with your son, doing fun activities that he would like (not sitting around watching TV). If he does this well, your son will see that his father is a cool interesting fun person too and you might actually find him spending more time with him and get jealous yourself! Good luck and remember if you hug and kiss your son and tell him you love him and be there for him too he will get over this. I guess some boys are just mama's boys! j/k Good luck!

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Lea - posted on 03/31/2010

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Nicola, my son throws those kind of tantrums too where he goes limp. I pick him up and carry him around his waist under my arm on my hip and he kicks but gets nothing but air. Its useful when he goes limp in the street because hes forcing me to drag him home from the playground.

Nicola - posted on 03/30/2010

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Honestly my son did this around this age and nothing had changed at home. Some children go through the terrible 2's early like my son who is now 2 and is alot better. When he was about this age he was hitting, punching, bitting, kicking, head butting ect. My SIL who is doing her masters in early childhood education said its completely normal and its there way of showing there frustrations since they can't vocalise it properly. What you need to do if he hurts your husband is go to your husband and not your son straight away when he does it and make a fuss of your husband (like you would if it were a child he'd hert) then tell your son that wasn't very nice ask him to say sorry with a kiss (as i'm asuming like my son he can't talk), if he refuses still or does it again say okay then because your naughty your going in time out, put them in there bedroom, let them know why there there and how long they have to stay in there, then close the door and wait for that amount of time before opening it. If they haven't hurt someone give them a warning first before time out and say to them if you don't stop "you will go to time out" before proceding with time out. They work out pretty quickly what there not meant to do and what a warning means. But also you need to focus on every positive thing they do at the same time and praise them for those things constantly as a child will want the praise rather then disapline and will do more good things and less bad. Our son turned 2 in January and is brilliant 95% of the time now and things are getting better rather then worse, you really know that there going through the terrible 2's early when they have a tantrum and you go pick them up and they make themselves all floppy so they weigh more. Also if he has a plan straight out tantrum anywhere, just try not to look at him and ignore him as they have trantrums to seek attention and need to learn thats not the right way of going about it.

Elizabeth - posted on 03/30/2010

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I understand with the lucky to be staying home. It is cheaper for us if I stay home with our 2 girls cause if I worked i wouldn't be bringing in any income it would just go to daycare and gas :)

Liz - posted on 03/30/2010

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It's called mommy and me. If my husband hugs and kisses me goodbye, my 3 year old gets goofey!

Stacy - posted on 03/30/2010

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I've been lucky enough to be able to stay at home with our son so he has me all to himself for 8-10 hours a day until my husband had a day off. I told my husband to start the activities with him like I used to do with him after reading your response Lea, & so far so good, lol. I know it's been a big adjustment for Liam to have Daddy home all the time, it's been a big one for me too, hahah.

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