2 year old With an ATTITUDE! HELP!!!

Kari - posted on 12/04/2009 ( 5 moms have responded )

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My two year old use to be the sweetest thing ever. She always said please, thank you and excuse me. Suddenly not only does she refuse to use these words, but she is also extremely sassy with people at the stores as well as family members. She is also in the habit of throwing horrible temper tantrums. (you know the kind when she throws herself on the floor kicking and pounding her fists.) I have tried everything, from ignoring it to time out, to even spankings, and nothing seems to work. I put her in the corner and she doesn't even care infact, after I take her out, she goes and sits back in it. I spank her and she yells at me. "no, I spank you", I find myself constently apologizing to everybody. Help me. What can I do to stop this behavior before it gets completly unmanagable.?

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Michelle - posted on 12/05/2009

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so u want to keep her from throwing tantrums so you throw your own by spanking her?
i have to agree with lee she's most likely not getting enough sleep.

Jessica - posted on 12/05/2009

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My son is 22 months old and does the same thing. I think it's something they have to grow out of. When he throws a fit in public, i just stand there and let him finish. At home it's take things away, time out, and spanks. One that seems to work, for me at least, is taking his shoes. Time is the only thing that will truly work.

Lee - posted on 12/05/2009

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Mine will be three in less than a month and she recently started acting out. Someone suggested to me that maybe her sleep routine was not as structured as it should be...So that very day I came home from work, explained we were getting ready to eat dinner...then we played a little until it was getting close to bed time and I then explained to her if she wanted to watch a movie we needed to do it now because after the movie it was time for bed and you know, she was a lot better the next day. I've also noted not to just "throw" things at her....communicating expectations and giving her a couple of minutes to absorb what is about to happen, whether it be time for bed, bath, time to get out of bath, etc. So, she could possibly be acting out due to lack of structure or routine....It may not be it at all, but I was like you....anything is worth a try :) I know there is nothing worse and I will keep you in my prayers :)

Laura - posted on 12/05/2009

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Hi, we had this exact problem with our daughter, but i think it is normal, as so did many friends. We did try a few things, like removing her favourite toy etc, but ignoring her did work best, you have just got to learn to not cave in, and if you are feeling stressed out, she will pick up on that, so go in the other room, make a drink or listen to a bit of the radio. When she does something good, over-praise her, so she realises that she gets lots of attention when she is good. get all your family to do the same, this is something our grandparents struggled with, so we stopped them seeing her for 3months untill the behaviour we wanted was established. The thing is to stay firm, and to stay calm. Kids are emotional sponges and if you dont feel comfortable with this, then your child will notice and continue pushing you till you break. So it is important, that if your feeling stressed out, or uncomfortable in ignoring the behaviour you do something to remove your focus from the situation, just make sure before leaving the room, that there is nothing to endanger your child.

Kay - posted on 12/05/2009

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My son when throught this....If he refused to say sorry to his sister I would put him in his room, let him out again and then if he didn't say sorry, back in eventually he wouold say sorry. I would even have to hang on to the door to keep him in.!! If he didn't say please I would not get him what he wanted....You forgot to ask nicely I would say...That is not the way to get what you want...If I am giving him something I would only let go of whatever it was when he said "Thankyou" ....My eldest son and daughter also went through a stage of swinging at me as well...which got them a visit to their rooms the talk after the room time goes a little like...You do not treat mummy like that I don;t like it...Please say you are sorry. "Sorry" You hurt mummy like that and it makes me very sad" They don;t like to see you sad...the good knock on effect is now they say "Stop it I don't like it" when they are playing so has helped them communicate as well!! Hope this helps??

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