ADHD help!!

Elizabeth - posted on 02/03/2011 ( 7 moms have responded )

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My 5 year old has been diagnosed with ADHD. The doctor said he wont step in and do anything until it starts to really interfere with his schooling and things like that. His father and I are going thru a nasty divorce and he doesnt hardly ever come around. The problem Im having is that D (the 5 year old) is yelling at me, screaming at me, raising his hand like he wants to hit me, telling me NO about everything or that he doesnt want to or have to (do whatever Im asking or telling him to do.) Ive tried time out, Ive tried putting his nose on the wall, Ive tried taking things away, Ive tried spanking. Nothing works. The last time I spanked him, he went to his room and was hugging a picture of his dad and crying and looked at me n said "Are you gonna hurt me?" when I walked in. I vowed that day to never spank him again. I dont know what to do anymore. I will not tolerate this behavior to continue! I need some help! Im going to get him into a counselor for all the crap hes gone thru with his dad leaving and all that, and hopefuly that will help, but what can I do until then?

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Kim - posted on 02/04/2011

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I agree with Theresa. I would difinately take him to a counselor immediately. Have them evaluate him. Doctors are so quick to call any troubled child these days, ADHD and put them on meds. He is obviously going through a tough time.

Try spending quality time doing fun things with him, the park, story time at the library or any activity away from the house that is special time with him. In our area they even have gymnastics for toddlers its only $5 a visit. My son loves it.

Sometimes stepping away from the norm of our everyday lives is a nice break for everyone. Deep breaths for you momma and good luck with the counseling.

Theresa - posted on 02/03/2011

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I'm not so sure it's an ADHD issue. It sounds like he may be acting out because of what's going on with his dad. Try spending more time with him doing things he enjoys. When he acts out try to acknowledge his anger. Let him know you understand that he's upset and that it's OK to be upset, however it's not OK to be disrespectful to you. He may need to have some help with the ADHD down the road, but for now I'd wait until things settle down with the divorce and he's been in counseling for awhile.

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Check out the parenting techniques at www.loveandlogic.com

They have suggestions for children who are "normal" (what kid is ever normal?) and children who suffer from issues like ADHD.
Plenty of free resources on the website and I have found their books at the library as well.

Also I agree with Kristy on the diet, there actually was just a study about this, it was done in Europe somewhere, and through a special elimination diet over 70% of the kids were symptom FREE!

Kristy - posted on 02/06/2011

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If it does turn out to be ADHD, look in to different diets for him. You can change a lot of their behaviour through diet. Or you could see a dietician for this. Good luck :))

Theresa - posted on 02/05/2011

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I had a bad experience with a play therapist for my son. He was 6 at the time. The therapist had my son draw a picture. He colored a rainbow, complete with storm clounds, rain and a sun in the corner. She interpreted that as him being depressed (because of the dark clouds), but he had some hope in him (the sun in the corner). I knew my son, he was very smart and very inquisitive. About a week or so before we had seen a rainbow and he asked how they were made. So I explained in detail about the raindrops and the sun shining through them to make the rainbow (short answers didn't pacify him, he wanted details). That was why he had drawn the picture that way. I never brought him back to her. I also had a good experience with one (a different one) with a foster child we had. Just make sure you think about anything the play therapist says to you about your kid. You know him best, so you can tell if something the therapist says doesn't seem right. Good luck.

Elizabeth - posted on 02/04/2011

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Ive talked with our director at work (I work at a Rehab facility for teens) and she gave me the name of a counselor nearby who does play therapy for young kids. Im gonna get in touch with her on Monday and set up an appt as soon as possible. Tonight we spent the whole evening playing his games on the Wii and he loved it. I used "please" and "thank you" a whole lot more and it seemed to help also. Thank you ladies for your input! :-)

Jenni - posted on 02/03/2011

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Theresa's right. So many kids are misdiagnosed with ADHD. Sounds like it's more to do with the stress of the divorce. I imagine you're going through a lot emotionally as well. Seeking councilling for the both of you isn't necessary but will aid you through this tough time.

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